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Home > Archive > Impotence Support > February 2005 > God Wants Us To Keep On Shagging
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God Wants Us To Keep On Shagging
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| And Adam lived one hundred and thirty years, and begot a son in his own
likeness, after his image, and named him Seth.
Seth lived one hundred and five years, and begot Enosh.
Enosh lived ninety years, and begot Cainan.
Cainan lived seventy years, and begot Mahalalel.
Mahalalel lived sixty-five years, and begot Jared.
Jared lived one hundred and sixty-two years, and begot Enoch.
Enoch lived sixty-five years, and begot Methuselah.
Methuselah lived one hundred and eighty-seven years, and begot Lamech.
Lamech lived one hundred and eighty-two years, and had a son.
And Noah was five hundred years old, and Noah begot Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
Genesis 6:1 Now it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of
the earth, and daughters were born to them,
2 that the sons of God saw the daughters of men, that they were beautiful;
and they took wives for themselves of all whom they chose.
*it really means they shagged all the girls they wanted :o)
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| Just A Guy 2005-02-09, 2:59 pm |
| In a similar vein, I saw this somewhere. It's the biblical approach to
finding women. I think #4 is tits. Hope you enjoy it...
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1. Marry a captive woman.
"Suppose you see among the captives a beautiful woman whom you desire
and want to marry, and so you bring her home to your house: she shall
shave her head, pare her nails, discard her captive's garb, and shall
remain in your house a full month, mourning for her father and mother;
after that you may go into her and be her husband, and she shall be your
wife."
--Deuteronomy 21:11-13
2. Marry a prostitute.
"When the Lord first spoke through Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea, "Go,
take for yourself a wife of whoredom and have children of whoredom, for
the land commits great whoredom by forsaking the Lord. So he went and
took Gomer daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son."
--Hosea 1:2-3
3. Find a man with seven daughters and then impress him.
"The priest of Midian had seven daughters. They came to draw water, and
filled the troughs to water their father's flock. But some shepherds
came and drove them away. Moses got up and came to their defense and
watered their flock." When the father found out what Moses had done, he
told his daughters to invite him to break bread. "Moses agreed to stay
with the man, and he gave Moses his daughter Zipporah in marriage."
--Exodus 2:16-21
4. Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty contest.
"And let the king appoint commissioners in all the provinces of his
kingdom to gather all the beautiful young virgins to the harem in the
citadel of Susa under custody of Hegai, the king's eunuch, who is in
charge of the women; let their cosmetic treatments be given them. And
let the girl who pleases the king be queen instead of Vashti. This
pleased the king and he did so."
--Esther 2:3-4
5. A wife?...No!
"I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious
about the affairs of the Lord, how to please the Lord; but the married
man is anxious about the affairs of the world, how to please his wife,
and his interests are divided...So then, he who marries his fianc=E9e
does well; and he who refrains from marriage will do better."
--1 Corinthians 7:32-38
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