Yoga - "Terminal" cancer patient new to yoga. Help?

Author

"Terminal" cancer patient new to yoga. Help?

David Covell

2004-10-20, 11:12 am

I'm a 51-year-old leukemia patient and veteran of 7 years of chemo,
radiation, and a bone marrow transplant. I am relapsing for the third time
and the medical community has nothing further to offer. My latest chemo was
very toxic and did not produce the desired effect, so I have "washed my
hands" of the toxic treatments. I am now on palliative care, and I am
completely at peace with my situation. Being classed as "terminal" actually
makes me laugh, since I'm still pretty active and certainly don't look or
act like I'm end-stage. I don't fear death, nor am I waiting around for it
to happen.

My only problem is pain. The disease and the large number of toxic
treatments have produced severe pain in the joints and muscles. Inactivity
during treatment has greatly increased the stiffness, pain and weakness. My
only exercise has been hiking, so my lower body is in much better shape than
my upper body.

I have considered yoga in the past but have feared it would be too painful
on the knees and shoulders. Yesterday morning I awoke at 2AM in so much
pain that I resorted to the big-gun Fentanyl patches which I reserve for the
really bad times. I dislike these strong opiates, and they aren't very
effective. In desperation I Googled up "yoga AND albuquerque" and found a
link to a center that was doing classes for cancer patients. Fearfully I
went just to check it out, and I ended up going through the class. The
amount of pain and difficulty I felt confirms how very much I need this. I
bought a book for over-50 beginners but it is weak in instructional
material. It has pictures of poses but not enough. I will visit the
bookstore today and look for something better, possibly with a DVD.

My concern today is that yesterday's session has aggravated my left
shoulder. During the session my left shoulder made a lot of cracking and
popping sounds, loud enough for everyone to hear. Today the muscles in the
upper left arm are intensely sore, to the point where I can't move my arm
without a lot of pain. There is another yoga-for-cancer session tomorrow
and I am worried about putting any weight on that side. The pain is not in
the joint but in the tendons and down the upper left arm. I think I overdid
it. What should I do? I am very motivated to pursue yoga, but maybe I need
to go a little slower than yesterday. I was the only newcomer (and the only
man) and I was trying to do what everyone else did, though not to the same
extents. Everything feels good today except for the arm. All the cracking
and popping and today's pain seems to indicate that this shoulder is in need
of special attention. I'm at a loss as to what to do. Tomorrow's session
has a different teacher so I'll need to explain the situation to her. Other
than that, what should I be doing now? Also, I'm an active and avid
guitarist and am curious about what role that may play in yoga. I play in a
contemplative style born of my habit of playing guitar while hiking in
scenic locations. My style is similar to what I've heard on satellite audio
on songs with titles indicative of yoga. Music in the outdoors, whether
hiking or sitting and marveling at nature, is currently my form of
meditation. Undisciplined and not goal-oriented, but fulfilling. I'm very
curious about how music will fit into a yoga lifestyle.

Any feedback welcome.

Stu

2004-10-20, 7:11 pm

On 2004-10-20 09:03:23 -0700, "David Covell" <dr-covell@sbcglobal.net> said:

> concern today is that yesterday's session has aggravated my left
> shoulder. During the session my left shoulder made a lot of cracking and
> popping sounds, loud enough for everyone to hear. Today the muscles in the
> upper left arm are intensely sore, to the point where I can't move my arm
> without a lot of pain. There is another yoga-for-cancer session tomorrow
> and I am worried about putting any weight on that side. The pain is not in
> the joint but in the tendons and down the upper left arm. I think I overdid
> it. What should I do? I am very motivated to pursue yoga, but maybe I need
> to go a little slower than yesterday.

I assume you have a teacher. Return to class and discuss the shoulder
problem. A good teacher will adjust the practice for your needs. You
have seen how yoga can elevate the quality of your life. Part of yoga
is about learning where your edge is. How far can you go? When to
back off. Very often asana practice is about playing with that edge.
There is some learning to do.

Maybe today you will only do restoration asanas like laying over a
bolster. As you progress in yoga you will learn about your limits, and
how to make yoga work for you.

> I was the only newcomer (and the only
> man) and I was trying to do what everyone else did, though not to the same
> extents.

I am very often the only man in my class. I have a spinal problem that
does not allow me to do the same things as many of the women. All of
us in the class have been practicing for 15 years or more. Very often
you will see me over near the horse or the wall ropes using the props
where the rest of the class is practicing unaided.

The important this is to keep your attention inside. Focused on your
progress. Don't worry about those around you.

> Everything feels good today except for the arm. All the cracking
> and popping and today's pain seems to indicate that this shoulder is in need
> of special attention. I'm at a loss as to what to do.

Try Ice or moist heat. Every hour or so. Do you have access to a whirlpool?

> Tomorrow's session
> has a different teacher so I'll need to explain the situation to her. Other
> than that, what should I be doing now? Also, I'm an active and avid
> guitarist and am curious about what role that may play in yoga. I play in a
> contemplative style born of my habit of playing guitar while hiking in
> scenic locations. My style is similar to what I've heard on satellite audio
> on songs with titles indicative of yoga. Music in the outdoors, whether
> hiking or sitting and marveling at nature, is currently my form of
> meditation. Undisciplined and not goal-oriented, but fulfilling. I'm very
> curious about how music will fit into a yoga lifestyle.
>
> Any feedback welcome.

I love to play the guitar. Music is not really a form of meditation,
it is a form of expression. It approaches a form of yoga when the
music expresses joy of the infinite nature of the moment.

Meditation in the yogic sense is a practice where there is no activity
or thought. You may want to pursue a meditation practice as well to
elevate your lifestyle. From reading your post I get the feeling your
have a great appreciation of the contemplative mind.

David - It sounds to me like your approaching your cancer with great
bravery and honesty. I wish all the best. I hope your new found yoga
practice will bring you greater strength, positive energy, and a long
life.
--
~Stu

Hari Har Singh

2004-10-20, 7:11 pm

Hello David,
welcome here :-)

"David Covell" <dr-covell@sbcglobal.net> schrieb im Newsbeitrag
news:f%vdd.16488$nj.1886@newssvr13.news.prodigy.com...
> What should I do? I am very motivated to pursue yoga, but maybe I need
> to go a little slower than yesterday.

You gave yourself the answer. :-)
Listen to your bodys signals.

> I was the only newcomer (and the only
> man) and I was trying to do what everyone else did, though not to the same
> extents.

Again - listen to your body and do only what you can do. Don't care about
the others.
Try to focus your concentration on what you do. Your limits are what need to
be respected - not the limitations the other do have.

Give your body - or parts of it - a rest if it needs to.

> Everything feels good today except for the arm. All the cracking
> and popping and today's pain seems to indicate that this shoulder is in
need
> of special attention. I'm at a loss as to what to do. Tomorrow's session
> has a different teacher so I'll need to explain the situation to her.
Other
> than that, what should I be doing now?

That's an important idea to tell the teacher and ask her to give you
exercise adjustments for your special case so that you can avoid to
continously aggravate your left shoulder. Be gentle with yourself.

> Also, I'm an active and avid
> guitarist and am curious about what role that may play in yoga. I play in
a
> contemplative style born of my habit of playing guitar while hiking in
> scenic locations. My style is similar to what I've heard on satellite
audio
> on songs with titles indicative of yoga. Music in the outdoors, whether
> hiking or sitting and marveling at nature, is currently my form of
> meditation. Undisciplined and not goal-oriented, but fulfilling. I'm
very
> curious about how music will fit into a yoga lifestyle.

It fit's very much into Yoga lifestyle - ever heard of MANTRAs? Holy ancient
words that are chanted.
A vast onlinesource of Mantra Music also used in Yoga classes - western and
eastern style - you can find here:
http://www.sikhnet.com/Gurbani

I'm shure there is much more to find in other sources. Maybe you'll find
this inspiratonal and healing.

Sat Nam - Hari Har Singh

Stu

2004-10-20, 7:11 pm

On 2004-10-20 13:51:28 -0700, "Hari Har Singh" <ffg67@gmx.de> said:

> 'm shure there is much more to find in other sources. Maybe you'll find
> this inspiratonal and healing.
>
>
> Sat Nam - Hari Har Singh

Good to have you back.
--
~Stu

Hari Har Singh

2004-10-20, 7:11 pm

"Stu" <Nospam@towel.com> schrieb im Newsbeitrag
news:2004102014152350073%Nospam@towelcom...

> Good to have you back.
> --
> ~Stu

Thank you Stu. :-)
Yes, it is so good - it's such a long time we do share now on the internet,
nearly 7 years of alt.yoga! I got used to it (or is it an addiction?)...

I had some hard times in the hospital this summer but now I'm growing
everyday stronger then I was ever before!
It's a new and fascinating experience, I even think about restarting my
Kundalini Yoga teaching.

Sat Nam - Hari Har Singh

gef

2004-10-21, 2:08 am

Well you are a very courageous and strong person. This is really
beautifull. Yoga is the union. As you said you were in your class trying
to do like others. Have you ever had that same feeling in your life
where you want to do like other and end up hurting yourself more...

I think you have the chance now to see and observe and reflect on every
little thing. As you probally understand you have to listen to yourself
first, even if the teacher tell you something else, even if the book say
something else, you can only listen to yourself now. No book nor dvd nor
teacher will teach you yoga, you are learning it from inside and you are
far further than many of us, than many person on the planet now, because
you have accepted the impermanance. You will die, like everyone of us,
but now you are face to face with it, something that we can't understand
until someone tells us.

My only advice is that you know everything. You have to listen to
yourself, listen to your inner guru to your inner self, to your dream,
but mostly to your body. Your body is going away now but doing yoga will
help it, but team up with your body one last time and let him tells you
how you will do your yoga. It's time to cherish it and to go it's way
and don't worry it will tells you what to do and your body will hurt
less and less the more you get friend with it.

You are doing great, keep on, you are beautifull

Namaste

In the light

David Covell wrote:
> I'm a 51-year-old leukemia patient and veteran of 7 years of chemo,
> radiation, and a bone marrow transplant. I am relapsing for the third time
> and the medical community has nothing further to offer. My latest chemo was
> very toxic and did not produce the desired effect, so I have "washed my
> hands" of the toxic treatments. I am now on palliative care, and I am
> completely at peace with my situation. Being classed as "terminal" actually
> makes me laugh, since I'm still pretty active and certainly don't look or
> act like I'm end-stage. I don't fear death, nor am I waiting around for it
> to happen.
>
> My only problem is pain. The disease and the large number of toxic
> treatments have produced severe pain in the joints and muscles. Inactivity
> during treatment has greatly increased the stiffness, pain and weakness. My
> only exercise has been hiking, so my lower body is in much better shape than
> my upper body.
>
> I have considered yoga in the past but have feared it would be too painful
> on the knees and shoulders. Yesterday morning I awoke at 2AM in so much
> pain that I resorted to the big-gun Fentanyl patches which I reserve for the
> really bad times. I dislike these strong opiates, and they aren't very
> effective. In desperation I Googled up "yoga AND albuquerque" and found a
> link to a center that was doing classes for cancer patients. Fearfully I
> went just to check it out, and I ended up going through the class. The
> amount of pain and difficulty I felt confirms how very much I need this. I
> bought a book for over-50 beginners but it is weak in instructional
> material. It has pictures of poses but not enough. I will visit the
> bookstore today and look for something better, possibly with a DVD.
>
> My concern today is that yesterday's session has aggravated my left
> shoulder. During the session my left shoulder made a lot of cracking and
> popping sounds, loud enough for everyone to hear. Today the muscles in the
> upper left arm are intensely sore, to the point where I can't move my arm
> without a lot of pain. There is another yoga-for-cancer session tomorrow
> and I am worried about putting any weight on that side. The pain is not in
> the joint but in the tendons and down the upper left arm. I think I overdid
> it. What should I do? I am very motivated to pursue yoga, but maybe I need
> to go a little slower than yesterday. I was the only newcomer (and the only
> man) and I was trying to do what everyone else did, though not to the same
> extents. Everything feels good today except for the arm. All the cracking
> and popping and today's pain seems to indicate that this shoulder is in need
> of special attention. I'm at a loss as to what to do. Tomorrow's session
> has a different teacher so I'll need to explain the situation to her. Other
> than that, what should I be doing now? Also, I'm an active and avid
> guitarist and am curious about what role that may play in yoga. I play in a
> contemplative style born of my habit of playing guitar while hiking in
> scenic locations. My style is similar to what I've heard on satellite audio
> on songs with titles indicative of yoga. Music in the outdoors, whether
> hiking or sitting and marveling at nature, is currently my form of
> meditation. Undisciplined and not goal-oriented, but fulfilling. I'm very
> curious about how music will fit into a yoga lifestyle.
>
> Any feedback welcome.
>
>

Stu

2004-10-23, 2:08 am

Hari Har Singh

2004-10-23, 11:10 am