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Home > Archive > Hepatitis disease > May 2005 > Hey Iceman
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| Hey Ice Baby, as you might notice I am posting in the clear, and let me guess
now, seeing as I spent the afternoon researching on behalf of some woman who is
obviously addicted to her own sociopath, and has been wasting my time and her's
for so long now, and I do so want to ask you this.
Would you be Paul Wilcock, of Syniverse Comprehensive Services, by any chance?
Bloody Yorkshire, where the men are man and the women are too, unlike
some places, where the men are women and the women just doormats to be walked
over by their sociopathic husbands.
Alan
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| Iceman 2005-05-05, 8:57 am |
| On Thu, 5 May 2005 07:11 +0100 (BST), Alan wrote:
> Hey Ice Baby, as you might notice I am posting in the clear, and let me guess
> now, seeing as I spent the afternoon researching on behalf of some woman who is
> obviously addicted to her own sociopath, and has been wasting my time and her's
> for so long now, and I do so want to ask you this.
>
Alan, take a break. Reconsider what has gone on, take a long look at
yourself and think about what has been going on as if you were a third
party or as if you were your own father giving some good advice to his son
in a similar situation. You do not need to fix blame on anyone to resolve
this. I'm sure you've seen others in a similar situation or in/on soap
opera's.
> Would you be Paul Wilcock, of Syniverse Comprehensive Services, by any chance?
>
No.
> Bloody Yorkshire, where the men are man and the women are too, unlike
> some places, where the men are women and the women just doormats to be walked
> over by their sociopathic husbands.
>
> Alan
Do you really expect someone to walk away from their children?
V pbhyq gryy lbh fgbevrf ertneqvat ynjlref naq qvibeprf gung jbhyq phey
lbhe unve. Vg pna or engure anfgl rfcrpvnyyl vs gur uhfonaq fnj vg pbzvat.
Rira jvgu n ovttre onqqre ynjlre vg vf n ybat qenja bhg nssnve gung arire
raqf. V jvyy abg trg vaibyirq jvgu guvf abe qb V jnag gb frr nal shegure
vasb ertneqvat vg. Vg vf orfg whfg jnyxrq njnl sebz. Yrg bguref unaqyr
gurve bja nssnvef, jbex guvatf bhg be jungrire. Whfg or tengrshy sbe nal
fhccbeg lbh unq guebhtu lbhe vyyarff naq yrnir vg ng gung.
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| In article <cwq47dwf1hj4.dlg@gl4c13r.org>, 1c3m4n@gl4c13r.org (Iceman) wrote:
> On Thu, 5 May 2005 07:11 +0100 (BST), Alan wrote:
Snip
Vs fur jba'g gnyx gb zr naq gryy zr jung vf tbvat ba gura jung shgher vf gurer
va vg sebz gur fgneg?
Naq V nz cbfgvat va gur pyrne naq pna pnapry zl bja cbfgf.
Alan
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|
| In article <cwq47dwf1hj4.dlg@gl4c13r.org>, 1c3m4n@gl4c13r.org (Iceman) wrote:
> Do you really expect someone to walk away from their children?
Do you know what Iceman, I am 54 years old and I have had hepatitis for ten
years now, and they told me I had ten years before I got seriously ill, and the
TX didn't work, and it really screwed my head up anyway, and I am not willing to
do it again.
She is 50 years old and has had hepatitis for ten years too.
That gives us both ten years before we turn into some kind of invalids dependent
upon our children to take care of us, as we slowly go into decline mumbling on
about "might have beens" and become a burden, and although they do their duty
and take care of us, or shuffle us off into a home, they secretly wish you would
hurry up and die and it would all be over with.
Now do I want to die like that being a burden to my children, with them secretly
hating me as they watch me die, or do I sell up this big empty house and the two
cars outside, and do what I have always wanted to do which is buy me a yacht and
sail off into the sunrise, and they can remember me as I am now, reasonably fit
and healthy and smiling as I say goodbye, and when I die they won't have the
torture of seeing me suffer.
And even if we don't "fancy" each other when we meet, we have laughed and had
fun for six years now and we are still friends and we could enjoy what time we
have left on this planet, and our children wouldn't have to watch us turn into
vegetables, and I know she loves sailing too.
So you can tell me how wrong I am, or how crazy I am, or that I am being
selfish, but somehow I just don't see it that way, because the fact remains that
we both have a terminal disease, that is going to kill us, and I have seen so
many people just stop posting over the years in this newsgroup, or tell us how
they live in some tiny flat doing silly things as they become encephalitic, with
their family staying at a safe distance because they are secretly scared of
catching that same disease, and let's also face the reality is that despite
everybody doing their best to convince people otherwise they still insist that
it is an "addicts disease".
And what good is it going to do either of us if we continue our academic studies
because that sentence of death still hangs over us both?
Now I sit here in this house worrying about her, and you saw how I hit the panic
button last week, so you know how I feel, and she sits there with that klutz
telling her how she is depressed because he makes her so miserable.
So don't bother telling me I am wrong Iceman, because I am sick and tired of
wasting my last ten years on this planet, and let's face it, an economic slump
might hit tomorrow and the value of this house could drop like a stone, and I
know about that because it has happened before.
So don't bother telling me how wrong I am because I don't want to know any more.
I just want the chance to die happy without my kids having to watch me die.
Alan
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|
| In article
<memo.20050505092710.792G@veloceraptor.free-online.co.uk>,
alan@veloceraptor.free-online.co.uk (Alan) wrote:
> So you can tell me how wrong I am, or how crazy I am, or
that I am being
> selfish, but somehow I just don't see it that way, because
the fact remains
> that we both have a terminal disease, that is going to
kill us, and I have
> seen so many people just stop posting over the years in
this newsgroup, or
> tell us how they live in some tiny flat doing silly things
as they become
> encephalitic, with their family staying at a safe distance
because they are
> secretly scared of catching that same disease, and let's
also face the
> reality is that despite everybody doing their best to
convince people
> otherwise they still insist that it is an "addicts
disease".
And you can try telling me that isn't true either, but the
fact is that each and every one of us in posting to this
hepatitis newsgroup is doing so because the other people in
the world don't understand us, and what we are going
through.
They kind of regard you as "diseased" and give you a wide
berth if they do know what is wrong with you, and if they
don't, then they don't understand why you don't want to go
down the pub with them, or why sometimes certain foods upset
you, or sometimes you just feel tired and want to spend the
day asleep, or sometimes you feel "grouchy", or "down", or
sad because somebody else you only know from a newsgroup has
disappeared and you just know that you will never hear from
them again like that damn Yardweed. Or why you spend two
hours chatting on the phone with somebody on the far side of
the world, and then accuse you of doing things you would
never do with somebody else's wife.
And right now I guess I am feeling sorry for myself, because
I am crying, but you can bet it won't last long, because I
am not going to waste what is left of my life feeling sorry
for myself, and if she doesn't want to come with me then I
am damn well going to go alone, while I am still able.
Do you get it now Iceman?
Now I'm going to continue cleaning up this house so that I
can put it on the market, and she can choose to do what she
likes, because I don't want anybody with me who doesn't
really want to be there, and as I once told her, if I was
making my wife unhappy, then the only way I could possibly
show her I truly loved her would be by buying her a ticket
to where she wants to go and waiting to see if she came
back, which I did one time, and she did come back, but then
most men aren't like me, they think they can own their wife,
but that just makes them selfish.
Alan
| |
| Iceman 2005-05-06, 9:18 am |
| On Thu, 5 May 2005 08:06 +0100 (BST), Alan wrote:
> Snip
Onfvp ehyr bs ynj.
Gubhf funyg abg pbire gul arvtuobef jvsr.
| |
| Iceman 2005-05-06, 9:18 am |
| On Thu, 5 May 2005 09:27 +0100 (BST), Alan wrote:
> In article <cwq47dwf1hj4.dlg@gl4c13r.org>, 1c3m4n@gl4c13r.org (Iceman) wrote:
>
>
> Do you know what Iceman, I am 54 years old and I have had hepatitis for ten
> years now, and they told me I had ten years before I got seriously ill, and the
> TX didn't work, and it really screwed my head up anyway, and I am not willing to
> do it again.
>
10 years from now? Or is this the end of your ten years?
10 years is a long (or short) time.  much can happen between now and
then.
> She is 50 years old and has had hepatitis for ten years too.
>
So do a lot of other people.
> That gives us both ten years before we turn into some kind of invalids dependent
> upon our children to take care of us, as we slowly go into decline mumbling on
> about "might have beens" and become a burden, and although they do their duty
> and take care of us, or shuffle us off into a home, they secretly wish you would
> hurry up and die and it would all be over with.
>
Why be so down in the mouth about it. Yes, it could be a burden to them but
good children return the favor of the time spent raising them. That's your
end of cycle lifetime achievement award. There are other options like rest
homes, etc.
> Now do I want to die like that being a burden to my children, with them secretly
> hating me as they watch me die, or do I sell up this big empty house and the two
> cars outside, and do what I have always wanted to do which is buy me a yacht and
> sail off into the sunrise, and they can remember me as I am now, reasonably fit
> and healthy and smiling as I say goodbye, and when I die they won't have the
> torture of seeing me suffer.
>
No one in their right mind would want to be a burden, but chit happens.
Have you ever sailed? Do you know how to handle a sailboat? Are you aware
of the high and continuous maintenance costs? Dock fee's? Always having to
run a generator to keep the freezer cold, batteries? An older boat is
cheap, ever wonder why? The constant labor to upkeep the damn thing? If you
cannot afford a crew it can keep you in shape or deplete you. There is a
lot to consider, navigation tools included.
Are you familiar with the lifestyle of dock dwellers? They still require
cars and transportation to buy food, clothing, go to the restaurant, etc.
Guns are required on the high seas due to pirates, yes even today.
> And even if we don't "fancy" each other when we meet, we have laughed and had
> fun for six years now and we are still friends and we could enjoy what time we
> have left on this planet, and our children wouldn't have to watch us turn into
> vegetables, and I know she loves sailing too.
>
This is a pipe dream you've been building up in your mind, most likely with
the wrong person. Take away the whole idea of the disease. Forget about it.
Think in rational terms. It is not necessarily a bond that ties.
> So you can tell me how wrong I am, or how crazy I am, or that I am being
> selfish, but somehow I just don't see it that way, because the fact remains that
> we both have a terminal disease, that is going to kill us, and I have seen so
> many people just stop posting over the years in this newsgroup, or tell us how
> they live in some tiny flat doing silly things as they become encephalitic, with
> their family staying at a safe distance because they are secretly scared of
> catching that same disease, and let's also face the reality is that despite
> everybody doing their best to convince people otherwise they still insist that
> it is an "addicts disease".
>
You are just dwelling in a self pity party. That is not a positive
attitude, and don't be giving me the reality bullshit. That is just a
depressive attitude and flat out giving up.
> And what good is it going to do either of us if we continue our academic studies
> because that sentence of death still hangs over us both?
>
Because it keeps your mind active, expands your horizons, keeps your mind
off what needs to be dealt with not dwelled on.
> Now I sit here in this house worrying about her, and you saw how I hit the panic
> button last week, so you know how I feel, and she sits there with that klutz
> telling her how she is depressed because he makes her so miserable.
>
Alan, I cannot even begin to tell you how deceptive caring about a
depressed/depressive woe is me type of peeps. They suck. It drags you down,
the endless repetitive cycles that always reoccur. I have had acquaintances
like that and no matter how many times I cheered them up and changed their
thinking ATM, they always (and I mean ALWAYS) reverted back to their former
positions. I even went to the length of proving to them by guiding them
through experiences that they were wrong, they even saw it was true for
themselves yet they still reverted. Others tried to do the same things for
them. I cannot tell you how glad I was to have them out of my life when
they moved or whatever. Having known peeps like that I could never consider
living with one, and especially a woman or wife. Now if I run across such a
person I avoid them like the plague. It is too draining. I would give them
the help they might need for the moment if I needed to be in the situation
and quickly extract myself. If they don't want to do it for themselves then
they do not want to be free. I don't know all the psychological terms for
it and really don't give a chit what they are, and certainly it is too
lengthy to go through all the in's n out's here but they will drain you
down and deplete you.
> So don't bother telling me I am wrong Iceman, because I am sick and tired of
> wasting my last ten years on this planet, and let's face it, an economic slump
> might hit tomorrow and the value of this house could drop like a stone, and I
> know about that because it has happened before.
>
> So don't bother telling me how wrong I am because I don't want to know any more.
> I just want the chance to die happy without my kids having to watch me die.
Then this is not the way to do it.
You are going to ruin my reputation with me carrying on a convo like this
and in some ways I should kick your butt to the moon over this as you sound
like a whiner and in a blue funk. You've taken all the stuff you built up
over the years about not whining, being strong, not feeling sorry for
yourself and blew it big time this last several weeks. You've given up life
for a pity party and that is pure bullshit. I realize it might be hard to
separate Iceman the flamer from all of this but you really need to face the
truth about life, self respect, honor and doing what is right.
Everyone is going to die, some early on, some later, some killed by one
disease or another, cars, trucks, plane crashes, whatever. In effect we are
all born to die. What the hell makes you think your so special because you
have a certain disease that *might* be terminal. Hell a car could smack you
tomorrow! What do you want on your tombstone, "He could have died from
Hep"? Did you wife play this game when she had cancer? I doubt it.
Think about it Alan, spend the time to think about it.
| |
| Iceman 2005-05-06, 9:18 am |
| On Thu, 5 May 2005 10:12 +0100 (BST), Alan wrote:
> And you can try telling me that isn't true either, but the
> fact is that each and every one of us in posting to this
> hepatitis newsgroup is doing so because the other people in
> the world don't understand us, and what we are going
> through.
>
Bullshit! Do you think you have a "special" disease? Do you think that
everyone who has a terminal illness is somehow less than you?
Death is death, diseases have their own personalities or side effects most
of it not very pleasant. Brain cancer is far more painful than what you are
going through as is many other diseases. Take a good look at Ebola disease
or its variants, would you rather have that?
hell, in reality you might say to another with Hep-C my pain is worse than
yours, or I have it worse than you, whatever. No one is saying it is
pleasant, no one is saying its comfortable. While it is true I do not have
the disease I have had friends that have gone through it. I understand to a
point. I know their feeling about leaving the family behind and even had a
friend who wanted me to marry his wife and take care of his kids when he
was gone. (she wasn't bad either and the boys were good kids) but that was
just a his way of helping her deal with the possible or inevitable future.
I understood that, but he did live a good deal longer than was expected as
many here have.
> They kind of regard you as "diseased" and give you a wide
> berth if they do know what is wrong with you, and if they
> don't, then they don't understand why you don't want to go
> down the pub with them, or why sometimes certain foods upset
> you, or sometimes you just feel tired and want to spend the
> day asleep, or sometimes you feel "grouchy", or "down", or
> sad because somebody else you only know from a newsgroup has
> disappeared and you just know that you will never hear from
> them again like that damn Yardweed. Or why you spend two
> hours chatting on the phone with somebody on the far side of
> the world, and then accuse you of doing things you would
> never do with somebody else's wife.
>
Listen to yourself bud, reread some of your posts wanting her to leave and
be with you, then tell me how you did not end up with ulterior motives.
If someone does not understand the disease then so what? If they are afraid
then so what? Does everyone have to like you because you have a disease? Or
are you just picking on that as the cause while in reality they thought
your breath stunk to high heaven or you dressed funny, hell mebbe they just
didn't want to be seen with you at a pub? Sure there are some peeps who are
ignorant of any disease, some even think cancer is contagious. Sometimes
you might have a penchant to be over sensitive about it. Get a grip! It is
not always the case, hell you might even be at fault for always wanting to
talk about "your special disease". I dunno.
> And right now I guess I am feeling sorry for myself, because
> I am crying, but you can bet it won't last long, because I
> am not going to waste what is left of my life feeling sorry
> for myself, and if she doesn't want to come with me then I
> am damn well going to go alone, while I am still able.
>
> Do you get it now Iceman?
>
I got it last week when I was in part flaming you and in part telling you
that you were out of hand. You've been feeling sorry for yourself for at
least a month or so. It is only now that you have in effect told us all
that I was correct all along.
> Now I'm going to continue cleaning up this house so that I
> can put it on the market, and she can choose to do what she
> likes, because I don't want anybody with me who doesn't
> really want to be there, and as I once told her, if I was
> making my wife unhappy, then the only way I could possibly
> show her I truly loved her would be by buying her a ticket
> to where she wants to go and waiting to see if she came
> back, which I did one time, and she did come back, but then
> most men aren't like me, they think they can own their wife,
> but that just makes them selfish.
>
> Alan
Alan, take a break, take a breath, go on a short holiday, keep your mouth
shut about any disease, have fun, clear the cobwebs out, then come home and
consider the difference between the life on holiday and how your really
want to spend your life. What kind of a woman you really want, and stop
being so damn needy! That is no way to develop friends all it does is
attract enablers n blah, blah, blah. You don't want a relationship like
that you would never be happy.
I certainly hope you are posting "X-No-Archive Yes" this chit is going to
be too embarrassing for you in the future should you ever recover your
dignity. But perhaps a little humility would do you good, eh? ;)
| |
| Professeur Von TwoSteps OA. 2005-05-06, 9:18 am |
| From : Iceman <1c3m4n@gl4c13r.org>
Message-ID : <1hpnzpexikh40.dlg@gl4c13r.org>
>Thous shalt not cover thy neighbors wife
In your case *elder* Iceman, unless you slip on a Viagra patch
any *neighbor's* wife is perfectly safe with you about
| |
| Professeur Von TwoSteps OA. 2005-05-06, 9:18 am |
| From : alan@veloceraptor.free-online.co.uk (Alan)
Message-ID : <memo.20050505092710.792G@veloceraptor.free-online.co.uk>
>they told me I had ten years before I got seriously ill
Whoever told you that Pom is less than wise.
Was this soothsayer wearing a *pretty red shirt* ?
There is *no* way anyone can predict the ultimate health progression of a
virus-hc + infection, unless it is clinically supervised on a weekly basis
Grit your teeth Pom, don't let *it* take over
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