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| Author |
prednisone and herpes?
|
|
|
| I am going to be taking prednisone for a severe bronchitis problem. I
am wondering if this will cause me to have outbreaks more frequently
now? If so how long can I expect the outbreaks to increase?
Thanks,
| |
|
| Everyone is different, Al.
I was on a three month course of pred and after I finished that, I was
blessed with a month-long outbreak of the worst herpes I've ever experienced
in my life. This was also when I developed neuralgia, which I had never had
before. I could not move, sit, lie down. Wearing any clothes was painful.
Bedsheets were too painful. I can not express to you how awful this
outbreak was. I will never take pred again.
I strongly recommend you get on valrex before you start and keep it up for a
little while afterwards.
Why would you need pred for a bronchitis problem? Bronchitis is generally
either caused by:
1) bacteria--pred won't help
2) virus--pred won't help
3) allergies--pred may help.
ar
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1150316394.825513.308680@r2g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
>I am going to be taking prednisone for a severe bronchitis problem. I
> am wondering if this will cause me to have outbreaks more frequently
> now? If so how long can I expect the outbreaks to increase?
>
> Thanks,
>
| |
|
| Hi Ar,
They are putting me on 10mg 2-4 times a day for 5 days and thats it. I
have asthma and thats why I need it because I have asthmatic
bronchitis. I am going to be out on Disability for a week and a half. I
also am going to take zthromax for 3 days to counteract immune
readiness problems, then mucinex and my usuals: Prevacid for acid
reflux and Lexapro for depression and anxiety.
I guess I could start taking valtrex starting tomorrow, but will that
interfere with the benefits of prednisone? I really dont want anymore
outbreaks.
Another thing is that someone else in my family also has genital herpes
i found out and she has been on prednisone for asthma, but I am not
sure I ever heard her mention increase of outbreaks from the
prednisone, but maybe she never mentioned it.
I hope I am not in for a "treat" from herpes now.
Al
grant wrote:[vbcol=seagreen]
> Everyone is different, Al.
>
> I was on a three month course of pred and after I finished that, I was
> blessed with a month-long outbreak of the worst herpes I've ever experienced
> in my life. This was also when I developed neuralgia, which I had never had
> before. I could not move, sit, lie down. Wearing any clothes was painful.
> Bedsheets were too painful. I can not express to you how awful this
> outbreak was. I will never take pred again.
>
> I strongly recommend you get on valrex before you start and keep it up for a
> little while afterwards.
>
> Why would you need pred for a bronchitis problem? Bronchitis is generally
> either caused by:
> 1) bacteria--pred won't help
> 2) virus--pred won't help
> 3) allergies--pred may help.
>
> ar
>
> "Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:1150316394.825513.308680@r2g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
| |
|
| Hi Al,
I really can't tell you what you may experience. I can only share with you
the horror I dealt with. Remember, I was on it for three months. The
valtrex, in my mind, would act much like the antibiotic. You're taking an
antibiotic just in case you pick something up when they shut down your
immune system. Well, the valtrex is the same thing, only with the virus
instead of a bacteria. But I'm not a doctor! I can't imagine the valtrex
interferring with the pred. I don't think they are related at all. But ask
your doctor to be sure.
ar
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-15, 8:24 am |
|
> I am going to be taking prednisone for a severe bronchitis problem. I
> am wondering if this will cause me to have outbreaks more frequently
> now?
It's possible you may get an outbreak as a result of taking the prednisone.
It's also possible that you may not get an outbreak from the prednisone.
> If so how long can I expect the outbreaks to increase?
Since everybody is so different it's really hard to know what the virus is
going to do w/you. Only you can tell what will happen ~ IF anything does
happen.
What did your doctor say? Are you taking anything to treat your herpes
outbreaks?
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
| Tim Fitzmaurice 2006-06-15, 4:25 pm |
| On Thu, 15 Jun 2006, grant wrote:
> Hi Al,
>
> I really can't tell you what you may experience. I can only share with you
> the horror I dealt with. Remember, I was on it for three months. The
> valtrex, in my mind, would act much like the antibiotic. You're taking an
> antibiotic just in case you pick something up when they shut down your
> immune system. Well, the valtrex is the same thing, only with the virus
> instead of a bacteria. But I'm not a doctor! I can't imagine the valtrex
> interferring with the pred. I don't think they are related at all. But ask
> your doctor to be sure.
There is a cold sore med in prep that works on this sort of principle, a
steroid to clear the inflammation of the lesion and the antiviral in the
cream too to go for the virus.
So the principle is sound. Just check the interaction potential with the
doc
Tim
--
When playing rugby, its not the winning that counts, but the taking apart
ICQ: 5178568
| |
|
| Hi everyone,
Thanks for the info. I am actually working with a doctor that doesnt
know about my herpes situation, but I have a large supply of valtrex at
home anyway, so I can always take one for lets say the 5 days I am on
prednisone. I'm going to call the pharmacy and see what they say.
My asthma has gotten severe and I need to do something unless I want to
die from pneumonia at the rate I am going. Well I need to lie down, I
am very tired as this bronchitis has worn me out.
Al
Tim Fitzmaurice wrote:
> On Thu, 15 Jun 2006, grant wrote:
>
>
> There is a cold sore med in prep that works on this sort of principle, a
> steroid to clear the inflammation of the lesion and the antiviral in the
> cream too to go for the virus.
>
> So the principle is sound. Just check the interaction potential with the
> doc
>
>
>
> Tim
> --
> When playing rugby, its not the winning that counts, but the taking apart
> ICQ: 5178568
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-16, 4:29 pm |
| > Hi everyone,
>
> Thanks for the info. I am actually working with a doctor that doesnt
> know about my herpes situation, but I have a large supply of valtrex at
> home anyway, so I can always take one for lets say the 5 days I am on
> prednisone. I'm going to call the pharmacy and see what they say.
Al ~ you really need to tell your doctor what is going on so he/she can be
aware of all of your health issues. How are they suppose to help you if they
don't know about what it is you are going through? Maybe there are different
ways to treat your conditions and since you have so many of them it's good
for you to be honest so they can do the best to help you. If they do not
have all the information how can you ever expect to have any relief in your
life?
> My asthma has gotten severe and I need to do something unless I want to
> die from pneumonia at the rate I am going. Well I need to lie down, I
> am very tired as this bronchitis has worn me out.
It sounds like you are in a very bad place and I believe you should pick up
the phone, call your doctor, and tell your doctor everything that is going
on. You've been in too much pain for too long and with all sorts of
different medical conditions according to what you have described over the
last year. It's time to get your health under control... don't you think?
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
|
| Hi Angela,
Well yes that is true that I have a number of health problems...don't
we all, maybe I have just a few more...
I told the doctor that I am seeing for the asthma that I have hpv
because once I think he was doing an exam and noticed it down there. I
didnt tell him about me having herpes because i felt embarresed. I have
however mentioned my herpes status to other doctors.
I am starting to do better thankfully, but it is a slow process and the
prednisone only seems to be making a slight difference in my breathing
easily. I still go into these asthma spasms and attacks. I have an
inhaler so I am pretty safe in that respect.
Al
Yoshi2me wrote:
>
> Al ~ you really need to tell your doctor what is going on so he/she can be
> aware of all of your health issues. How are they suppose to help you if they
> don't know about what it is you are going through? Maybe there are different
> ways to treat your conditions and since you have so many of them it's good
> for you to be honest so they can do the best to help you. If they do not
> have all the information how can you ever expect to have any relief in your
> life?
>
>
> It sounds like you are in a very bad place and I believe you should pick up
> the phone, call your doctor, and tell your doctor everything that is going
> on. You've been in too much pain for too long and with all sorts of
> different medical conditions according to what you have described over the
> last year. It's time to get your health under control... don't you think?
>
> Angela
>
>
> --
> "By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
> showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
> person."
>
> Herpes Help
> http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
>
> STD Message Board
> http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
>
> Picking Up the Pieces
> http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-17, 2:28 am |
| Hope you will feel better soon.
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1150497115.198071.323680@h76g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
> Hi Angela,
>
> Well yes that is true that I have a number of health problems...don't
> we all, maybe I have just a few more...
>
> I told the doctor that I am seeing for the asthma that I have hpv
> because once I think he was doing an exam and noticed it down there. I
> didnt tell him about me having herpes because i felt embarresed. I have
> however mentioned my herpes status to other doctors.
>
> I am starting to do better thankfully, but it is a slow process and the
> prednisone only seems to be making a slight difference in my breathing
> easily. I still go into these asthma spasms and attacks. I have an
> inhaler so I am pretty safe in that respect.
>
> Al
>
>
>
> Yoshi2me wrote:
>
| |
|
| Just a few thoughts here. I was prescribed Lotrisone by one of the
physicians I saw when I went to see him, but the rash was pretty much
gone by that point. It didn't help me at all, but it didn't make
anything worse.
I would say that if you have herpes though, steer clear of all oral or
topical steroids. They tend to have an immunosuppressant effect. Strong
topical steroids also thin the skin (reversibly) but depending on where
this is applied this can also be undesirable too.
My two cents on this,
~Eric
| |
|
| Thanks Eric, I think I was prescribed Lotrisone cream once and I didnt
notice anything as a result of that either.
Well I am off the Prednisone now and it was a short treatment. I didnt
want to mix all those pills so I chanced not taking the valtrex. I did
notice a little achiness in the thighs and groin but nothing else
happened. No new outbreaks at this point.
The doctor put me on a steroidal inhaler called Flovent, and it works
like Valtrex being suppressive therapy. The difference in my mind
between this and valtrex is that valtrex is suppressive for shedding
and comfort reasons, flovent for survival. Now I am just wondering if
taking this for a long time will work like taking prednisone for a long
time? I know that Flovent and Prednisone are both Cortico Steroids. I
don't use topical steroidal skin creams like cortisone as I know that
can cause outbreaks.
Does anyone have any thoughts on the inhaled use of Flovent as a
cortico Steroid and the likelyhood of increased outbreaks, or am I over
reacting?
Thanks,
Al
Eric wrote:
> Just a few thoughts here. I was prescribed Lotrisone by one of the
> physicians I saw when I went to see him, but the rash was pretty much
> gone by that point. It didn't help me at all, but it didn't make
> anything worse.
>
> I would say that if you have herpes though, steer clear of all oral or
> topical steroids. They tend to have an immunosuppressant effect. Strong
> topical steroids also thin the skin (reversibly) but depending on where
> this is applied this can also be undesirable too.
>
> My two cents on this,
>
> ~Eric
| |
|
|
> Thanks Eric, I think I was prescribed Lotrisone cream once and I didnt
> notice anything as a result of that either.
Yeah, I would still not use it if you feel an ob coming on.
> Well I am off the Prednisone now and it was a short treatment. I didnt
> want to mix all those pills so I chanced not taking the valtrex. I did
> notice a little achiness in the thighs and groin but nothing else
> happened. No new outbreaks at this point.
Your aches were probably normal. Glad to hear no new ob's though!
> The doctor put me on a steroidal inhaler called Flovent, and it works
> like Valtrex being suppressive therapy. The difference in my mind
> between this and valtrex is that valtrex is suppressive for shedding
> and comfort reasons, flovent for survival. Now I am just wondering if
> taking this for a long time will work like taking prednisone for a long
> time? I know that Flovent and Prednisone are both Cortico Steroids. I
> don't use topical steroidal skin creams like cortisone as I know that
> can cause outbreaks.
Flovent is a corticosteroid (fluticasone) which is used the supress
the immunological resonse which results in the contractions which cause
asthma. Ask you doctor about taking it along with Valtrex, but most
likely he will keep you on Valtrex to help suppress an ob while taking
the Flovent. Check out emedicine for more details on Flovent.
> Does anyone have any thoughts on the inhaled use of Flovent as a
> cortico Steroid and the likelyhood of increased outbreaks, or am I over
> reacting?
Asi I just said it does have an effect on the immune system
particularly in your lungs where it is inhaled, so I think you might be
overreacting--again run it past your doc.
~Eric
| |
|
| Okay, I'll talk to him about it. In general my herpes situation is
recently much better and I am not sure why, but I seem to be getting
few and far between outbreaks and the ones I get are very mild now. So
I am very much better herpes wise. Now I just have to get my asthma
situation on track.
Al
> Asi I just said it does have an effect on the immune system
> particularly in your lungs where it is inhaled, so I think you might be
> overreacting--again run it past your doc.
>
> ~Eric
| |
|
|
|
|
> Okay, I'll talk to him about it. In general my herpes situation is
> recently much better and I am not sure why, but I seem to be getting
> few and far between outbreaks and the ones I get are very mild now. So
> I am very much better herpes wise. Now I just have to get my asthma
> situation on track.
>
> Al
That is good news! For once I actually agree with something Angela
said..LOL. I'm not sure if I ever asked you what viral type you have.
With HSV-1, I just read a primary article where shedding was 1% in
males and this tapers off with time, just like HSV-2 does (except
type-2 has a much higher shedding rate), both in the frequency and
severity of ob's. So chances are it will only continue to get better!
~Eric
| |
|
| Hi Eric and Angela,
I have oral hsv-1 and genital hsv-2, and genital hpv (genital warts).
My oral herpes are very mild, only to the extent of slight
burning/tingling sensations and red areas, but no blisters maybe 2-3
times a year. Genitally it has been a lot more severe. As far as with
the hpv I have had them come and gotten them removed and then come
back. I've given up on getting them removed, so I have some now that I
am just going to leave and say "the heck with this".
I guess there is a rate of shedding associated with hpv as well as with
herpes on both symtomatic and asymtomatic, although I don't know what
that is.
When you say that shedding is 1% in males with HSV-1, do you mean
genitally? I am asking because I heard that orally HSV-1 has a pretty
frequent shedding rate. So its very possible to give someone oral
herpes on the other person lips, by kissing them even if no cold sores
are present.
Al
>
> That is good news! For once I actually agree with something Angela
> said..LOL. I'm not sure if I ever asked you what viral type you have.
> With HSV-1, I just read a primary article where shedding was 1% in
> males and this tapers off with time, just like HSV-2 does (except
> type-2 has a much higher shedding rate), both in the frequency and
> severity of ob's. So chances are it will only continue to get better!
>
> ~Eric
| |
|
| > Hi Eric and Angela,
>
> I have oral hsv-1 and genital hsv-2, and genital hpv (genital warts).
> My oral herpes are very mild, only to the extent of slight
> burning/tingling sensations and red areas, but no blisters maybe 2-3
> times a year. Genitally it has been a lot more severe. As far as with
> the hpv I have had them come and gotten them removed and then come
> back. I've given up on getting them removed, so I have some now that I
> am just going to leave and say "the heck with this".
>
> I guess there is a rate of shedding associated with hpv as well as with
> herpes on both symtomatic and asymtomatic, although I don't know what
> that is.
>
> When you say that shedding is 1% in males with HSV-1, do you mean
> genitally? I am asking because I heard that orally HSV-1 has a pretty
> frequent shedding rate. So its very possible to give someone oral
> herpes on the other person lips, by kissing them even if no cold sores
> are present.
>
> Al
>
Oral herpes is often very mild, heck I might have it orally and not
even know it. I'm sorry to hear that your genital HSV-2 has been
rougher. Don't get frustrated with the HPV..did they give you an HPV
strain? Yes, HPV sheds too. I don't have any shedding data on that for
you.
I mean that I just read a primary article where they found genital
HSV-1 to asymptomatically shed 1% of the time in males. The asympt.
shedding rate of oral HSV-1 has been found to be up to about 20% I
believe. Genital HSV-2 also has a high shedding rate somewhere around
this.
~Eric
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-21, 8:26 am |
|
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1150860877.157620.246610@p79g2000cwp.googlegroups.com...
> I have oral hsv-1 and genital hsv-2, and genital hpv (genital warts).
> My oral herpes are very mild, only to the extent of slight
> burning/tingling sensations and red areas, but no blisters maybe 2-3
> times a year. Genitally it has been a lot more severe. As far as with
> the hpv I have had them come and gotten them removed and then come
> back. I've given up on getting them removed, so I have some now that I
> am just going to leave and say "the heck with this".
>
> I guess there is a rate of shedding associated with hpv as well as with
> herpes on both symtomatic and asymtomatic, although I don't know what
> that is.
You know... I'm not as familiar with HPV as well as I am with HSV. I do know
that it's possible to pass HPV even if there are no signs or symptoms
present so I guess that would be there is some type of asymptomatic shedding
going on with HPV. I can tell you that with HSV it's possible to have
asymptomatic shedding before, during, and after an outbreak. For those that
don't have outbreaks that they can see, feel, or recognize the asymptomatic
shedding isn't as often but it's still there and it's why people are
contracting these viruses without really knowing it and especially if people
assume that they can't if there isn't anything that they can see or feel.
> When you say that shedding is 1% in males with HSV-1, do you mean
> genitally? I am asking because I heard that orally HSV-1 has a pretty
> frequent shedding rate. So its very possible to give someone oral
> herpes on the other person lips, by kissing them even if no cold sores
> are present.
A person with genital herpes type-1 OR oral herpes type-1 is going to have
some asymptomatic shedding going on. People with oral herpes can pass it to
somebody's mouth or somebody genitals through kissing and/or oral sex. So
yes, it's always going to be possible to pass herpes even if there are no
signs or symptoms present.
Hope this helps,
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
|
| Hello Eric and Angela,
> You know... I'm not as familiar with HPV as well as I am with HSV. I do know
> that it's possible to pass HPV even if there are no signs or symptoms
> present so I guess that would be there is some type of asymptomatic shedding
> going on with HPV.
Well I don't really know the rate of shedding with HPV either, but I
have had it at least 10 years and it comes and goes. I have had it
removed and it always manages to come back. I was told that mine is
probably not cancer causing, but I don't know the strain. I have had
two different types. One type looks like a single fleshy mole and seems
to favor the groin area, another type looks like little waxy clusters
of 6-8 in a group and those are right on my genitals.
> A person with genital herpes type-1 OR oral herpes type-1 is going to have
> some asymptomatic shedding going on. People with oral herpes can pass it to
> somebody's mouth or somebody genitals through kissing and/or oral sex. So
> yes, it's always going to be possible to pass herpes even if there are no
> signs or symptoms present.
I was kind of curious about this, because I know that HSV-1 oral is
very common, as much at 65% I heard. So in order for it to be that
common its probably due to a high asymtomatic shedding rate. Maybe 20%
is about right, but I heard its also more easy to spread it from mouth
to mouth than mouth to genitals or genital to genital in the case of
HSV-1.
>From what I understand; 65% of the US population has oral herpes, and
22% has genital herpes. About 20% has genital hpv. Then when you figure
the type 6-7, varicella and EBV, your talking about 90-95% for each of
those.
So realistically 90% of the US population has types 6+7,
varicella/shingles zoster, and epstein barr. Another 65% have oral
simplex, and 25% or so have it genitally and also have genital hpv. I
know I have varicella, EBV and the oral and genital herpes and hpv, not
sure about 6+7, but most people aquire that by age 3 so its very
possible.
Al
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-22, 4:26 pm |
|
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1150984042.393923.88050@c74g2000cwc.googlegroups.com...
> Hello Angela,
>
>
>
>
> Well I don't really know the rate of shedding with HPV either, but I
> have had it at least 10 years and it comes and goes. I have had it
> removed and it always manages to come back. I was told that mine is
> probably not cancer causing, but I don't know the strain.
That is correct... if you are getting the genital warts then you do not have
the HPV type that can cause cervical cancer. There are 100+ strains of HPV.
> I have had
> two different types. One type looks like a single fleshy mole and seems
> to favor the groin area, another type looks like little waxy clusters
> of 6-8 in a group and those are right on my genitals.
Just because the warts look different to you doesn't mean they are two
different types of HPV.
>
>
> I was kind of curious about this, because I know that HSV-1 oral is
> very common, as much at 65% I heard.
Oral herpes is very common... doesn't really matter what the percentage is
of people that have it... does it? Is the percentage really that important?
Is knowing the percentage really going to change whether or not the person
you are with has it or not? Don't you still have to find out if your partner
has herpes in spite of percentages?
> So in order for it to be that
> common its probably due to a high asymtomatic shedding rate. Maybe 20%
> is about right,
The fact of the matter remains... there is going to be asymptomatic
shedding... it might be often in one person and then not so often in another
person. Some people might get oral herpes outbreaks all the time and others
might not get oral herpes outbreaks as often. So each person is going to
shed at a different rate and/or have outbreaks at a different rate. The
thing about asymptomatic shedding is people can't possibly know when it's
happening... which is why I can't for the life of me understand why so many
people worship statistics sooo much. The fact remains... you may find a
partner and you may want to know what her status is... etc. Statistics are
good but if you use them or take them too far they can sometimes blind
people. (make sense?)
> but I heard its also more easy to spread it from mouth
> to mouth than mouth to genitals or genital to genital in the case of
> HSV-1.
Tell that to somebody that contracted genital herpes type-1 via oral sex.
All it took was one time for that individual to contract herpes. Do you
think statistics mean THAT much to the person that contracted it in this
way? It's always going to be possible and how does one person know if it
will happen to them or not? Ultimately they don't know and even though we
have statistics doesn't mean that it's never going to be possible to
contract herpes in this way... (make sense?)
> 22% has genital herpes. About 20% has genital hpv. Then when you figure
> the type 6-7, varicella and EBV, your talking about 90-95% for each of
> those.
What point were you trying to make?
> varicella/shingles zoster, and epstein barr. Another 65% have oral
> simplex, and 25% or so have it genitally and also have genital hpv. I
> know I have varicella, EBV and the oral and genital herpes and hpv, not
> sure about 6+7, but most people aquire that by age 3 so its very
> possible.
What's possible Al ~ you lost me.
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
|
| Sorry Angela, I was just rambling on like I often do. I guess I was
trying to justify that most people have herpes so I wouldnt get
depressed as I do sometimes, but you know what? I'm a herpes hero! lol
Are you?? :o)
Al
>
>
> What point were you trying to make?
>
>
> What's possible Al ~ you lost me.
>
> Angela
>
>
> --
> "By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
> showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
> person."
>
> Herpes Help
> http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
>
> STD Message Board
> http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
>
> Picking Up the Pieces
> http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-23, 8:24 am |
| I guess what I don't understand is how people get trapped into being
depressed about having herpes... especially people that have had herpes for
years and have had a chance to soak up all that information... ya know?
I don't know if I would go so far as to call myself a herpes hero... I think
I would rather stick to calling myself an H Pal
http://www.yoshi2me.com/herpes-h-pals.html
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1151030757.778966.292910@y41g2000cwy.googlegroups.com...
> Sorry Angela, I was just rambling on like I often do. I guess I was
> trying to justify that most people have herpes so I wouldnt get
> depressed as I do sometimes, but you know what? I'm a herpes hero! lol
> Are you?? :o)
>
> Al
>
>
>
>
>
| |
|
| Al and Angela,
Just a few remarks scattered below. Hope I can help!
> That is correct... if you are getting the genital warts then you do not have
> the HPV type that can cause cervical cancer. There are 100+ strains of HPV.
>
Perhaps they could culture it for you, Al. Odds are it's either 6 or
11, and they aren't the high-risk ones.
>
> Oral herpes is very common... doesn't really matter what the percentage is
> of people that have it... does it? Is the percentage really that important?
> Is knowing the percentage really going to change whether or not the person
> you are with has it or not? Don't you still have to find out if your partner
> has herpes in spite of percentages?
My own view on this is I can't see how percentages don't matter.
Statistics are just a numerical reflection of reality. Of course
knowing a percentage isn't really going to change whether a particular
person has it. But it shows the odds of that person already having it,
and moreover, due to the high prevalence rates, it shows society's
acceptance of the virus. The high percentage is why we came up with the
cute little phrases "coldsores" or "fever blisters". The high
percentage of HSV-1 makes for a great way to downplay the threat of
HSV-1 to a partner when you are telling them. I think the statistics
here are very important.
> The fact of the matter remains... there is going to be asymptomatic
> shedding... it might be often in one person and then not so often in another
> person. Some people might get oral herpes outbreaks all the time and others
> might not get oral herpes outbreaks as often. So each person is going to
> shed at a different rate and/or have outbreaks at a different rate. The
> thing about asymptomatic shedding is people can't possibly know when it's
> happening... which is why I can't for the life of me understand why so many
> people worship statistics sooo much. The fact remains... you may find a
> partner and you may want to know what her status is... etc. Statistics are
> good but if you use them or take them too far they can sometimes blind
> people. (make sense?)
The fact of the matter is that of course there is going to be
asymptomatic shedding from HSV-1 orally. The last study I read
indicated about a 1% shedding rate of genital HSV-1 in males. Other
studies have given a 3% rate. The rates in both locations fall off with
time. That's a maximum of 11 days out of the year there might be some
virus present and this falls off with time! It's even more compelling
when you put these statistics alongside the prevalance statistics.
Knowing the statistics allows both you and your partner to make an
accurate threat assessment and protect accordingly.
> Tell that to somebody that contracted genital herpes type-1 via oral sex.
> All it took was one time for that individual to contract herpes. Do you
> think statistics mean THAT much to the person that contracted it in this
> way? It's always going to be possible and how does one person know if it
> will happen to them or not? Ultimately they don't know and even though we
> have statistics doesn't mean that it's never going to be possible to
> contract herpes in this way... (make sense?)
I think I may have genital hsv-1. Yes, all it took was one time. Yes,
it has been devastating to me. Yet I am not nearly as devastated as I
would be I I were in the minority. Statistics mean everything to me. I
use them to justify to myself that I am not nearly the only one out
there with this disease. I also use statistics to reassure myself that
I am in the majority of people with this virus. And I further use
statistics to prove that genital hsv-1 is really a "sexually
transmiSSIBLE" rather than "sexually transmiTTED" disease based on
negligible shedding rates and through common sense protective measures.
> What point were you trying to make?
I think his point is that herpes viruses are ubiquitous.
>
> What's possible Al ~ you lost me.
It's possible to have herpes an be in the majority. It's possible to
have herpes and based on shedding and prevalance rates know how to tell
and protect a partner accordingly. It's possible to work to erase the
stigma of herpes using facts and statistics.
~Eric
| |
|
| Hi Eric.
Well at this point I am not too concerned about the strain, I know for
a fact it is genital hpv and it hasnt gone away in over 10 years, so I
guess I own it. I just tell people that I have herpes and hpv as if its
common talk. I try not to make it dramatic, just make it look like
something that I had to mention. I find that about 80% of people are
accepting of either of them.
>
>
> Perhaps they could culture it for you, Al. Odds are it's either 6 or
> 11, and they aren't the high-risk ones.
>
I guess I would consider myself an H pal also, although I don't have
anywhere near the herpes knowledge that Angela has because she has been
on top of it for a long time. I've probably had it as long as her, but
have only known about it as being herpes and hpv for almost 2 years. I
think knowing that you are not alone and there are alot of others with
herpes and hpv really helps.
Angela, As far as why I got depressed over it (and thats another reason
alot of people might be taking things like Lexapro etc.) is because it
is an incurable sexual disease. Even though I had it a long time it was
a shock to learn what was going on instead of it being something like
an allergic reaction. To make matters worse I unknowingly gave genital
herpes to a woman I was dating shortly after I was infected, although
now she is my best friend and we are very close anyway. She is a very
special friend to me and thinking that I gave her herpes makes me feel
very guilty and depressed.
> It's possible to have herpes an be in the majority. It's possible to
> have herpes and based on shedding and prevalance rates know how to tell
> and protect a partner accordingly. It's possible to work to erase the
> stigma of herpes using facts and statistics.
| |
|
| Al,
I'm surprised that you still show symptoms of HPV after all of this
time. Many times the body can eradicate HPV.
Like I said, I rely heavily of statistics because they are a numerical
reflection of reality. I know some people on here are uncomfortable
with statistics, so I guess they are uncomfortable with reality too. I
would say she is a far cry from being "on the top of it" because I
believe she has many misconceptions regarding hsv-1. I certainly
respect the work and help she gives to the hsv-2 crowd though and I
think she means well.
Again, look to the statistics, Al, in spite of what people who aren't
comfortable with reality might suggest.
~Eric
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-24, 4:25 pm |
| "Eric" <ejk235@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1151084545.209165.214080@u72g2000cwu.googlegroups.com...
> Al and Angela,
> My own view on this is I can't see how percentages don't matter.
It's nice for a person to know what their odds are when they are trying to
make important life decisions. But, even in those instances they can't make
those important decisions if they are not given all of the facts. Each
person will make their own choices based on themselves whether that stat is
high OR whether the stat is low. Everybody is different.
> Statistics are just a numerical reflection of reality. Of course
> knowing a percentage isn't really going to change whether a particular
> person has it. But it shows the odds of that person already having it,
> and moreover, due to the high prevalence rates, it shows society's
> acceptance of the virus.
Statistics only show odds based on certain circumstances. Not all
circumstances are the same, not all people are the same, etc. etc. etc. One
individual can not speak for society as a whole either. You have to take
each person's stance, their reasons, and go from there... If everybody
believed one way we would all be miserable.
> The high percentage is why we came up with the
> cute little phrases "coldsores" or "fever blisters". The high
> percentage of HSV-1 makes for a great way to downplay the threat of
> HSV-1 to a partner when you are telling them. I think the statistics
> here are very important.
The high percentage has nothing to do with what a condition is called.
(IMHO) Personally I don't find the terms "cold sores" or "fever blisters" to
be cute at all. I don't really know of too many health issues that are
"cute" atually... Knowing that there are high percentages of people that
have herpes type-1 is *never* a reason to sugar coat the possibilities.
Being straightforward and not pussy-footing around is the best approach but
again...that my own take on it.
> The fact of the matter is that of course there is going to be
> asymptomatic shedding from HSV-1 orally. The last study I read
> indicated about a 1% shedding rate of genital HSV-1 in males. Other
> studies have given a 3% rate. The rates in both locations fall off with
> time. That's a maximum of 11 days out of the year there might be some
> virus present and this falls off with time!
I'm not going to debate numbers because in the end all it takes is ONE time
for the circumstances to be just right and everbody is different.. the
situations are all different too.. as well as each individual's history with
their virus.
In any case... asymptomatic shedding OR not... nobody can tell when they are
shedding. Asymptomatic shedding can take place before, during, and sometimes
after an outbreak. Asymptomatic shedding takes place even when their are no
outbreaks. There is no precise way to know which days out of the year a
person is going to have asymptomatic shedding. So what it really boils down
to for somebody that is trying to decide if they want to be the person... is
1.) Do they like you so much that they could care less about those rates 2.)
Do they realize that they are just not that into you for whatever reason
(personality perhaps) and decide that you aren't even worth that 1% risk?
(This is just an example)
People have a right to be able to decide what it is they would like to get
themselves into whether they choose to believe it's a big deal OR not. All
it takes is ONE time. All it takes is ONE person. All it takes is ONE
oppurtunity. All it takes is ONE situation... to make a difference. (This is
just my opinion)
> It's even more compelling
> when you put these statistics alongside the prevalance statistics.
> Knowing the statistics allows both you and your partner to make an
> accurate threat assessment and protect accordingly.
Many couples will decide together how they wish to proceed. There are times
that might be appropriate to use protection and other times when the couple
might decide "together" that they could care less about using protection.
Over the course of my time helping others it has been such a pleasure to see
so many couples working through life's little hurdles together to overcome
and not sweat the small stuff.
> I think I may have genital hsv-1.
What makes you "think" that you may h ave genital herpes type-1?
> Yes, all it took was one time. Yes,
> it has been devastating to me. Yet I am not nearly as devastated as I
> would be I I were in the minority.
Yes BUT whether you are in the majority OR in the minority makes no
difference because you have it - right?
> Statistics mean everything to me.
Statistics don't change who you are and neither do viruses. Only YOU hold
the keys to your own happiness.
> I
> use them to justify to myself that I am not nearly the only one out
> there with this disease.
You are not alone - that is for sure. There are many people that have herpes
type-1 and there are many people that have herpes type-2. Having herpes
doesn't define who you are. Can't you see that distinct difference? You are
not your virus. You are not your STD. You are not your STI. You are not your
coldsore. You are not your fever blister. You are not your Herpes. You are
not your HSV. You are you. You are who you are.
> I also use statistics to reassure myself that
> I am in the majority of people with this virus.
I'm starting to see a pattern here...
Eric ~ were you a follower OR were you a leader back in high school? You
know how the old saying goes... if the majority of the people that have
herpes type-1 jumped off the empire state building... would you follow them?
Were you the kid in high school that was always looking for approval from
the accepted majority? Were you the kid always trying to people please? Were
you the kid that was always worried about what other people are going to
think? Are you the adult that is worried that you colleguegs are going to
look down on you when they find out you have herpes? Should people with
health conditions go through life feeling that self-rejection or that
self-hatred? Do you hate yourself THAT much?
> And I further use
> statistics to prove that genital hsv-1 is really a "sexually
> transmiSSIBLE" rather than "sexually transmiTTED" disease based on
> negligible shedding rates and through common sense protective measures.
::: shakes head :::
> It's possible to have herpes an be in the majority.
Who cares? How is that really going to affect how you choose to live your
life?
> It's possible to
> have herpes and based on shedding and prevalance rates know how to tell
> and protect a partner accordingly.
The shedding rates and one person's ideas of what the prevalance rates OR
even what to call the condition do not change the root of a more seious
issue...
Issues of the Heart. Issues of self loathing. Issues of wanting to feel
accepted. People pleasing issues. etc. etc. etc.
> It's possible to work to erase the
> stigma of herpes using facts and statistics.
It's possible but some would rather drag their head in the sand and hide
behind numbers.
Again... this is just my opinion,
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
| |
|
|
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-24, 4:25 pm |
| You're a piece of work Eric...
::: shakes head :::
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
"Eric" <ejk235@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1151095288.782863.311010@m73g2000cwd.googlegroups.com...
> Al,
>
> I'm surprised that you still show symptoms of HPV after all of this
> time. Many times the body can eradicate HPV.
>
> Like I said, I rely heavily of statistics because they are a numerical
> reflection of reality. I know some people on here are uncomfortable
> with statistics, so I guess they are uncomfortable with reality too. I
> would say she is a far cry from being "on the top of it" because I
> believe she has many misconceptions regarding hsv-1. I certainly
> respect the work and help she gives to the hsv-2 crowd though and I
> think she means well.
>
> Again, look to the statistics, Al, in spite of what people who aren't
> comfortable with reality might suggest.
>
> ~Eric
| |
|
| Angela,
I'm so happy to agree with you on some of these issues! This is great!
Now if I could just get an apology from you for your crappy treatment
of me.. ;-) LOL..my responses are scattered below.
> It's nice for a person to know what their odds are when they are trying to
> make important life decisions. But, even in those instances they can't make
> those important decisions if they are not given all of the facts. Each
> person will make their own choices based on themselves whether that stat is
> high OR whether the stat is low. Everybody is different.
Absolutely not, but statistics are facts. Each person needs the full
picture in order to decide or himself or herself.
> Statistics only show odds based on certain circumstances. Not all
> circumstances are the same, not all people are the same, etc. etc. etc. One
> individual can not speak for society as a whole either. You have to take
> each person's stance, their reasons, and go from there... If everybody
> believed one way we would all be miserable.
Yes, and those circumstances are dependent on the study being
conducted. The circumstances I quoted are shedding of HSV-1 in males
with genital HSV-1 as detected by PCR. I would never presume to speak
for society. But I really do support using statistics as part of
educating a partner. Let them see how damn common herpes really is, ya
know?
> The high percentage has nothing to do with what a condition is called.
> (IMHO) Personally I don't find the terms "cold sores" or "fever blisters" to
> be cute at all. I don't really know of too many health issues that are
> "cute" atually... Knowing that there are high percentages of people that
> have herpes type-1 is *never* a reason to sugar coat the possibilities.
> Being straightforward and not pussy-footing around is the best approach but
> again...that my own take on it.
In my honest opinion, sure it does. For the same reason we have
"chickenpox" instead of varicella-zoster. People embrace euphemisms and
develop colloquial terms when a disease is as highly prevalent as hsv-1
or vzv. LOL, I agree I don't think they're all that cute..but they
certainly are euphemisms. I agree with you on being straight-forward
and giving them all of the facts, but this is much easier said than
done. People don't want to know that they in all likelihood probably
have herpes type-1. And people will fight you 'til their death vowing
that their "coldsores" aren't "herpes". It's so sad, it really is.
> I'm not going to debate numbers because in the end all it takes is ONE time
> for the circumstances to be just right and everbody is different.. the
> situations are all different too.. as well as each individual's history with
> their virus.
I already said that all it takes is one time. I can't agree with you
more here. By statistics are crucial to properly educating oneself and
a partner. Like I said, let them know how damn common this really is..
> People have a right to be able to decide what it is they would like to get
> themselves into whether they choose to believe it's a big deal OR not. All
> it takes is ONE time. All it takes is ONE person. All it takes is ONE
> oppurtunity. All it takes is ONE situation... to make a difference. (This is
> just my opinion)
Well they don't have a right if they get it from somebody who doesn't
know. Or somebody who doesn't want to know and resists education. Or
somebody who knows but doesn't care. Again, I agree with you that all
it takes is one time. But that is why we need statistics all the more
to know how to protect those we care about!
> Many couples will decide together how they wish to proceed. There are times
> that might be appropriate to use protection and other times when the couple
> might decide "together" that they could care less about using protection.
> Over the course of my time helping others it has been such a pleasure to see
> so many couples working through life's little hurdles together to overcome
> and not sweat the small stuff.
Yeah I agree with you. I think it's really awesome when a couple loves
each other so much that they can put the whole issue aside. I think
that's why herpes testing is very important and helpful because if I
ever can find a girlfriend she can go get tested for type-1. But I
would also say again that that is why statistics are important. If you
can tell a partner "even if you get this you will be in the high
majority of people and shedding is very low and recurrences follow the
pattern of 40% never get another ob and 50% get 1-2 over the next 1-2
yrs. and only about 10% get more than that" it makes it that much
easier to put the issue aside for both of us.
> What makes you "think" that you may h ave genital herpes type-1?
Possible recurrence about a week ago--sunburn-like redness and burning.
> Yes BUT whether you are in the majority OR in the minority makes no
> difference because you have it - right?
Physically, no. The virus is mine. Psychologically and socially, it
makes all of the difference in the world because there isn't as fierce
a stigma attached to this type. Don't get me wrong, it's still bad :-(
It also might make it a little easier for me to find a girlfriend
because the majority of folks do already have the virus, but we'll see.
> Statistics don't change who you are and neither do viruses. Only YOU hold
> the keys to your own happiness.
Wow, I agree with you totally here. I know I didn't do anything
terribly wrong to get this virus. I'm just struggling very much to find
the keys to my own happiness...
> You are not alone - that is for sure. There are many people that have herpes
> type-1 and there are many people that have herpes type-2. Having herpes
> doesn't define who you are. Can't you see that distinct difference? You are
> not your virus. You are not your STD. You are not your STI. You are not your
> coldsore. You are not your fever blister. You are not your Herpes. You are
> not your HSV. You are you. You are who you are.
Yes I can see the difference. But the better question is, can other
people see that difference. The fact that people are so unwilling to
learn anything about herpes frightens me. I know I am who I am. But
hsv-1 is a part of that. And it will define me, I pray to God only to a
small extent, in the eyes of others.
> Eric ~ were you a follower OR were you a leader back in high school? You
> know how the old saying goes... if the majority of the people that have
> herpes type-1 jumped off the empire state building... would you follow them?
> Were you the kid in high school that was always looking for approval from
> the accepted majority? Were you the kid always trying to people please? Were
> you the kid that was always worried about what other people are going to
> think? Are you the adult that is worried that you colleguegs are going to
> look down on you when they find out you have herpes? Should people with
> health conditions go through life feeling that self-rejection or that
> self-hatred? Do you hate yourself THAT much?
Well I was very outspoken and loved to debate. ;-) Was I looking for
approval? Not really. But in high school you can switch groups of
friends, you can reinvent yourself. I'm not worried that colleagues are
going to look down because they either won't know about it or if they
do they'll be colleagues in medicine or research who know all of the
facts about hsv-1. I'm worried about women here. They are at the crux
of the problems in my life right now. They are the ones who are brutal
and unaccepting and scutinizing to the point where marriage and
children are impossible now. OMG, people with health conditions should
never go though life feeling self-rejection and self-hatred. But it's
no easy struggle to push aside those horrible feelings! I don't hate
myself. I just can't see myself being successful right now..it's a
horrible thing.
> Who cares? How is that really going to affect how you choose to live your
> life?
Like I said, some social and psychological effects here.
> The shedding rates and one person's ideas of what the prevalance rates OR
> even what to call the condition do not change the root of a more seious
> issue...
>
> Issues of the Heart. Issues of self loathing. Issues of wanting to feel
> accepted. People pleasing issues. etc. etc. etc.
Very, very difficult to put aside those issues. Takes time, support,
and struggling to overcome them. Plus I think some antidepressants
might help too.
> It's possible but some would rather drag their head in the sand and hide
> behind numbers.
Well I don't want you to think that I'm hiding behind numbers.
Statistics are offering me support in knowing what I am up against
here, but I'm not hiding from reality. You can't hide from reality
behind a numerical reflection of reality, you know? I honestly believe
that statistics and numbers are great--let people see how damn common
this is.
Take care,
~Eric
BTW: Where has Grant been?
| |
|
|
>
> Al ~ believe it or not you are a blessing. I hope you know that.
> I read what you wrote here and couldn't help but smile and realize that all
> it took was ONE good person to love and accept me for who I am. ONE person
> to love ME in spite of my faults and in spite of my health issues. All it
> took was ONE awesome guy!!
Thank you, that made me feel good. I consider myself to be a really
good person, although I have my faults also.
>
> One day you are going to find the right one and she is going to love you for
> who you are and she won't care about the rest as much as she will about
> what's in your heart.
>
> It's all good.
I hope so, because I am getting a little discouraged meeting women
online and offline, herpes or no herpes, i cannot seem to find the
right one yet.
>
> Al ~ you have come such a long way believe it or not. I am proud of you for
> doing your best to grasp what you can so that you can move on with your
> life. This is a good thing.
>
> On a personal note ~ I realize I might be a bit over-the-top in my aproach
> but it's always for right reasons. You have come so far ~ you do realize
> that right?
>
Yes, and I have also made a determination on why I may be doing better
with my outbreaks, not having one in 6 weeks! I determined that its a
combination of less caffeine, less stress, sleeping more, eating
better, not eating chocolate that much and do to being sick, i havent
had any sex in a while. I think all of these have helped me avoid
outbreaks. I'm sure I'll eat my words soon...
>
> You've got to stop beating yourself up over all of this... k? Just let it
> go.
Yes I am doing better about it. I met this woman online that I am
talking to and going to meet her this week, but I dread about telling
her i have herpes. One person told me to wait until the third date as a
golden rule.
>
> BTW ~ have you seen the slide show that I made for my husband on our 5 year
> anniversary?
No I havent, but I will check out the PUP site to see it, or is it on
Yoshi2me.com? I have my photos on PUP also, just me right now. You
should go to Bobstock also, but its kind of far for you I think. I
might not be able to go anyway, because of this darn bronchitis.
Al
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-24, 4:25 pm |
|
"Al" <alphaorder2000-genitalherpes@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1151169998.695968.113300@b68g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
>
> No I havent, but I will check out the PUP site to see it, or is it on
> Yoshi2me.com? I have my photos on PUP also, just me right now. You
> should go to Bobstock also, but its kind of far for you I think. I
> might not be able to go anyway, because of this darn bronchitis.
www.herpes-help.blogspot.com
Angela
| |
| Yoshi2me 2006-06-24, 4:25 pm |
| "Eric" <ejk235@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1151167773.283302.314900@y41g2000cwy.googlegroups.com...
> Angela,
>
> I'm so happy to agree with you on some of these issues! This is great!
> Now if I could just get an apology from you for your crappy treatment
> of me.. ;-) LOL..my responses are scattered below.
Sure! When Hell freezes over! LMAO
>
> Absolutely not, but statistics are facts. Each person needs the full
> picture in order to decide or himself or herself.
Statistics are not always black and white. They can sometimes go up
(depending on circumstances) and they can sometimes go down (depending on
circumstances). Until you are able to have 100% outcome there will always be
a percentage of things or people that will not fall into the majority OR
will not fall into the minority. Statistics are a good starting point but
they are not the be-all and they are not to be used as a tool to manipulate
others to suit your own personal agenda. Statistics are kinda like
guidelines but should never be used as justification to lie or manipulate
somebody.. it's just not right. (But that point is a mute and dead point
with you anyway so I won't dwell on that with you any longer Eric)
>
> Yes, and those circumstances are dependent on the study being
> conducted. The circumstances I quoted are shedding of HSV-1 in males
> with genital HSV-1 as detected by PCR. I would never presume to speak
> for society. But I really do support using statistics as part of
> educating a partner. Let them see how damn common herpes really is, ya
> know?
Sure... give them the statistics and they get to decide how they would like
to proceed. When I told Don I couldn't guarantee that he would never
contract genital herpes from me - it was the honest thing to say. Why?
Because there was no statistic anywhere that could make that guarantee no
matter how long I had been on suppressive therapy OR how many condoms we
used. He needed to decide if being with me was worth the risk. We made those
decisions together based on reality and worst case scenarios.
>
> In my honest opinion, sure it does. For the same reason we have
> "chickenpox" instead of varicella-zoster. People embrace euphemisms and
> develop colloquial terms when a disease is as highly prevalent as hsv-1
> or vzv. LOL, I agree I don't think they're all that cute..but they
> certainly are euphemisms.
There isn't anything cute about any of it. In fact.. it's downright
insulting that a "cold sore" commercial would show somebody trying to hide
behind a newspaper so people couldn't see the herpes outbreak on their
mouth. Illness sucks and not just the STD/STI variety. You can have a
billion different names for Herpes and it's not going to change what it is:
Herpes.
> I agree with you on being straight-forward
> and giving them all of the facts, but this is much easier said than
> done.
No, it's not an easy thing to do. It down right sucks and I sucked at
telling Don that I have herpes. Rejection or the possibility of rejection
sucks all the way around... but that's life and you go on and you do the
best you can and you do your best to be honest and that's that. Life wasn't
supposed to be easy. How you choose to react to life is what is kicking your
butt right now... Sometimes I think that YOU are your worst enemy here...
NOT the herpes.
> People don't want to know that they in all likelihood probably
> have herpes type-1. And people will fight you 'til their death vowing
> that their "coldsores" aren't "herpes". It's so sad, it really is.
Yup!!
I call it exactly what it is: Herpes.
>
> I already said that all it takes is one time. I can't agree with you
> more here. By statistics are crucial to properly educating oneself and
> a partner. Like I said, let them know how damn common this really is..
Just because it's "common" or "popular" in your eyes doesn't make it some
sort of treat to have...
>
> Well they don't have a right if they get it from somebody who doesn't
> know. Or somebody who doesn't want to know and resists education. Or
> somebody who knows but doesn't care. Again, I agree with you that all
> it takes is one time. But that is why we need statistics all the more
> to know how to protect those we care about!
I'm so glad to hear that you want to protect your potenital partners. I
applaud you on that! You've come a long way baby!
>
> Yeah I agree with you. I think it's really awesome when a couple loves
> each other so much that they can put the whole issue aside.
Now if we can just get individuals to put herpes aside long enough to see
the value in who they are so they can have better self esteem and be happy
again... with themselves first of course. ;)
> I think
> that's why herpes testing is very important and helpful because if I
> ever can find a girlfriend she can go get tested for type-1.
Hopefully people are not limiting themselves to the type of herpes testing
they should have. I would hope that people going into herpes testing would
want to know if they have type-1, type-2, both, or nothing at all. That's
what herpes type specific testing is all about.
> But I
> would also say again that that is why statistics are important. If you
> can tell a partner "even if you get this you will be in the high
> majority of people and shedding is very low and recurrences follow the
> pattern of 40% never get another ob and 50% get 1-2 over the next 1-2
> yrs. and only about 10% get more than that" it makes it that much
> easier to put the issue aside for both of us.
You can't make any guarantees Eric. You can spout percentages and statistics
until you are blue in the face and you can't predict what will actually
happen. All you can do is guess at what you think might happen and in the
end you won't really know until you cross that bridge and make it to the
other side. By the time you do... your life will be over.
>
> Possible recurrence about a week ago--sunburn-like redness and burning.
Did you get in within the first 24-48 hours to have a culture/typing test
done?
>
> Physically, no. The virus is mine. Psychologically and socially, it
> makes all of the difference in the world because there isn't as fierce
> a stigma attached to this type. Don't get me wrong, it's still bad :-(
> It also might make it a little easier for me to find a girlfriend
> because the majority of folks do already have the virus, but we'll see.
Whatever... you say Eric. :::sigh:::
>
> Wow, I agree with you totally here. I know I didn't do anything
> terribly wrong to get this virus. I'm just struggling very much to find
> the keys to my own happiness...
I hope you are able to dig through all that mess and find them...
I hope you are able to find them soon...
It's so sad to see the hold that having herpes on you...
>
> Yes I can see the difference. But the better question is, can other
> people see that difference. The fact that people are so unwilling to
> learn anything about herpes frightens me. I know I am who I am. But
> hsv-1 is a part of that. And it will define me, I pray to God only to a
> small extent, in the eyes of others.
Whatever you say Eric... :::shakes head again:::
>
> Well I was very outspoken and loved to debate. ;-) Was I looking for
> approval? Not really. But in high school you can switch groups of
> friends, you can reinvent yourself. I'm not worried that colleagues are
> going to look down because they either won't know about it or if they
> do they'll be colleagues in medicine or research who know all of the
> facts about hsv-1. I'm worried about women here. They are at the crux
> of the problems in my life right now. They are the ones who are brutal
> and unaccepting and scutinizing to the point where marriage and
> children are impossible now. OMG, people with health conditions should
> never go though life feeling self-rejection and self-hatred. But it's
> no easy struggle to push aside those horrible feelings! I don't hate
> myself. I just can't see myself being successful right now..it's a
> horrible thing.
In other words... you choose not to see yourself happy and you believe that
all women are dumb. ok.. I think I understand it now...
>
> Like I said, some social and psychological effects here.
>
>
> Very, very difficult to put aside those issues. Takes time, support,
> and struggling to overcome them. Plus I think some antidepressants
> might help too.
I totally agree!! But, you also need some counseling Eric.
>
> Well I don't want you to think that I'm hiding behind numbers.
> Statistics are offering me support in knowing what I am up against
> here, but I'm not hiding from reality. You can't hide from reality
> behind a numerical reflection of reality, you know? I honestly believe
> that statistics and numbers are great--let people see how damn common
> this is.
>
> Take care,
>
> ~Eric
>
> BTW: Where has Grant been?
I'm willing to guess that she is around and will probably pick up when she
sees I'm done with this discussion. ;)
Have a nice weekend...
Angela
--
"By opening up to a partner and talking about an STD diagnosis you are
showing that you respect and care about yourself as well as the other
person."
Herpes Help
http://www.yoshi2me.com/index.html
STD Message Board
http://yoshi2me.com/phpbb/index.php
Picking Up the Pieces
http://yoshi2me.com/pup/index.html
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>
> www.herpes-help.blogspot.com
>
> Angela
That was a really nice slide show. Don is really lucky to have you,
because you're a really exceptional person in alot of ways. I think
Fiona is especially cute, especially the photo of her with the pig
tails on the pup photo album area. I was amazed to learn that you lived
in all those places in the US and Europe. I never went to Italy or
Greece, and since they are both my ethnic backgrounds I should go
sometime. You ought to visit RI sometime, the beaches and Newport are
really nice, but Providence is getting a little over crowded,
trafficated and the crime isnt that good. Have you ever thought of
adding voice or sound to your slide show?
Al
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"Yoshi2me" <yoshi2me@zippety-doo-dah.com> wrote in message
news:CUgng.93393$IZ2.58085@dukeread07...
>
> I'm willing to guess that she is around and will probably pick up when she
> sees I'm done with this discussion. ;)
>
Yep. I made it perfectly clear that I would not continue any discussion
where Angela was being bashed. And there you have it.
ar
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| > >> BTW: Where has Grant been?
>
> Yep. I made it perfectly clear that I would not continue any discussion
> where Angela was being bashed. And there you have it.
Well hop back in because I am by no means in love w/ her, but our last
few messages have been much more agreeable. No more Angela bashing
:-)..I'm still waiting for an apology from her though..LOL.
~Eric
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> Sure! When Hell freezes over! LMAO
You know, just when I thought you might have seen how terrible you were
to me, you say that. Shame on you.. :-)
> Statistics are not always black and white. They can sometimes go up
> (depending on circumstances) and they can sometimes go down (depending on
> circumstances). Until you are able to have 100% outcome there will always be
> a percentage of things or people that will not fall into the majority OR
> will not fall into the minority. Statistics are a good starting point but
> they are not the be-all and they are not to be used as a tool to manipulate
> others to suit your own personal agenda. Statistics are kinda like
> guidelines but should never be used as justification to lie or manipulate
> somebody.. it's just not right. (But that point is a mute and dead point
> with you anyway so I won't dwell on that with you any longer Eric)
There is nothing in life that is certain. We all know that. Statistics
look at probablities, not certainties. Telling partners the facts and
statistics isn't manipulating them, it's educating them so they can
then decide for themselves whether the risk is worth it. In the end,
nothing is certain, but the idea is to try to prevent transmission as
much as humanly possible.
> Sure... give them the statistics and they get to decide how they would like
> to proceed. When I told Don I couldn't guarantee that he would never
> contract genital herpes from me - it was the honest thing to say. Why?
> Because there was no statistic anywhere that could make that guarantee no
> matter how long I had been on suppressive therapy OR how many condoms we
> used. He needed to decide if being with me was worth the risk. We made those
> decisions together based on reality and worst case scenarios.
I like your story. I just don't see how discussing stats goes against
anything you did. Like I said, nothing in life is certain. There always
going to be some amount of risk. Stats just help quantify that risk.
That's all..
> There isn't anything cute about any of it. In fact.. it's downright
> insulting that a "cold sore" commercial would show somebody trying to hide
> behind a newspaper so people couldn't see the herpes outbreak on their
> mouth. Illness sucks and not just the STD/STI variety. You can have a
> billion different names for Herpes and it's not going to change what it is:
> Herpes.
Well the commercial is just marketing. They love to exploit people's
fears and insecurities..and if you don't have any, they'll be happy to
give you a few ;-)
> No, it's not an easy thing to do. It down right sucks and I sucked at
> telling Don that I have herpes. Rejection or the possibility of rejection
> sucks all the way around... but that's life and you go on and you do the
> best you can and you do your best to be honest and that's that. Life wasn't
> supposed to be easy. How you choose to react to life is what is kicking your
> butt right now... Sometimes I think that YOU are your worst enemy here...
> NOT the herpes.
I know. You either go on and tell people or you go on and don't tell
people. It's sad that people would choose the latter. I know life
wasn't supposed to be easy..but I think it takes some time and some
healing to rebound from this.
> Just because it's "common" or "popular" in your eyes doesn't make it some
> sort of treat to have...
Gosh, I never said it was a treat..I just said it's common.
> I'm so glad to hear that you want to protect your potenital partners. I
> applaud you on that! You've come a long way baby!
I'm working hard to overcome this. It isn't easy. It takes time,
support, and healing.
> Now if we can just get individuals to put herpes aside long enough to see
> the value in who they are so they can have better self esteem and be happy
> again... with themselves first of course. ;)
Yes, but again this isn't easy. This takes time, healing, and support
from great people.
> Hopefully people are not limiting themselves to the type of herpes testing
> they should have. I would hope that people going into herpes testing would
> want to know if they have type-1, type-2, both, or nothing at all. That's
> what herpes type specific testing is all about.
Can't agree with you more. Type-specific testing is indispensable.
> You can't make any guarantees Eric. You can spout percentages and statistics
> until you are blue in the face and you can't predict what will actually
> happen. All you can do is guess at what you think might happen and in the
> end you won't really know until you cross that bridge and make it to the
> other side. By the time you do... your life will be over.
I know I can't. I wouldn't claim to ever--like I said nothing is
certain. But percentages and statistics are helpful to show a partner
such things as how many people already have this and how many ob's they
generally get and what risk is generally associated with things such as
shedding. It's part of educating them in my opinion.
> Did you get in within the first 24-48 hours to have a culture/typing test
> done?
Nope..health insurance is in the process of getting straightened out.
That aside, there has never ever been any blisters or ulcers at all for
them to culture. Perhaps a PCR might work, but mega-$ and I don't know
where they even do it at.
> I hope you are able to dig through all that mess and find them...
>
> I hope you are able to find them soon...
>
> It's so sad to see the hold that having herpes on you...
Well women are unforgivingly scrutinizing. Once I have a stable
relationship, this almost disappears as an issue. Once married, it is a
non-issue. So the hard part is going to be getting there..
> In other words... you choose not to see yourself happy and you believe that
> all women are dumb. ok.. I think I understand it now...
No, I choose to see myself happy. I just can't see myself happily
married. Of course not all women are dumb. But they are all very
scrutinizing of guys. They are much, much more selective in choosing a
guy then guys are in choosing a girl. Guys are much more forgiving of
flaws and tend to look for someone who will love them. Women look for
love, money, looks, brains, money, lack of STDs, confidence, stability,
money..LOL ;-)
> I totally agree!! But, you also need some counseling Eric.
Yep. But how expensive is that? Not too much $ here..
> I'm willing to guess that she is around and will probably pick up when she
> sees I'm done with this discussion. ;)
Well I hope she returns soon.
~Eric
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>
> Yep. But how expensive is that? Not too much $ here..
>
Hi Eric,
I actually go to a counselor myself and I think alot of people go to
them. It helps me with life issues, dating, and herpes. My health
insurance pays for most of it and it only costs about $15.00 per 1 hour
session so its pretty reasonable.
Al
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"Eric" <ejk235@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:1151201724.270984.58540@u72g2000cwu.googlegroups.com...
> No, I choose to see myself happy. I just can't see myself happily
> married. Of course not all women are dumb. But they are all very
> scrutinizing of guys. They are much, much more selective in choosing a
> guy then guys are in choosing a girl. Guys are much more forgiving of
> flaws and tend to look for someone who will love them. Women look for
> love, money, looks, brains, money, lack of STDs, confidence, stability,
> money..LOL ;-)
Really? When was the last time you dated a man? You got it wrong, Eric.
Men aren't like that at all. I have yet to find one, other than my husband,
who was forgiving of anything. Let alone, not a jerk.
Point being, people are people. We all have our flaws. But to think that
men are easier about this than women...you should just drop that line of
thought because it just ain't going to fly.
ar
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| I
> had worn the "screw me over and get away with it" for far too long before I
> met Don.
I still think I wear that "screw me over and get away with it" now. I
am having a terrible time meeting the right person, and its not just
because of having herpes, because most women I tell about my herpes are
pretty accepting of it. I just keep meeting women who like cheating on
guys.
> I have that exact slide show on myspace to some music. I would share it with
> you except that I'd have to stifle you first! lol ;)
Okay, you can stifle me...
I actually have a space on MySpace and on Yahoo 360, but I don't put
much into them. They are just kind of out there. I like to add funny
crime stories to my Little Rhody Web Site. The link is on your yoshi2me
site under affiliated sites I think.
> PS I got your instant message. I will respond longer a little bit later.
> Hang in there and try and put it behind you.
Thanks, I'm so hurt about what happened. I don't know what I should do
at this point. I went on an eating bing last night because of it and
ate a whopper with cheese and almost a whole chocolate cake!
Al
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