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| Hi,
I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
this will be an active group with people readily sharing their experiences.
Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
started.
VJ
| |
| Dan McGown 2006-06-04, 7:47 am |
|
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D680589B58Cvinyljunkie@198.186.190.155...
> Hi,
>
> I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
> this will be an active group with people readily sharing their
> experiences.
> Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
> could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
> tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
> but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
> started.
>
> VJ
Welcome to the group and welcome to your first day of sobriety. Please try
to ignore the trolls who have recently invaded and just pay attention when
someone really tries to help. Stay with it, please. Yes, it is tough at
first but it gets much better -- in fact it gets to where you are glad to be
alive.
Dan
| |
| Joe Jared 2006-06-04, 7:47 am |
| On Fri, 02 Jun 2006 14:33:37 +0000, VJ wrote:
> Hi,
>
> I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
> this will be an active group with people readily sharing their experiences.
> Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
That means you're the star today. In meetings, when a newcomer opens up
and shares their misery, it takes me right back to day 1. And some people
say newcomers have nothing to offer.  Welcome.
> could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
> tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
> but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
> started.
You'll hear this in varying flavors. If what you're doing isn't working,
try something different. AA would be a good choice in this area.
--
Listed? You must be joking http://relays.osirusoft.com
Pallorium V. Jared ruling http://www.oretek.com/lawsuite/ruling.pdf
http://www.oretek.com/lawsuite/
| |
|
| "Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in
news:z_udnbgwwJaL_B3ZnZ2dnUVZ_v6dnZ2d@adelphia.com:
>
> "VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:Xns97D680589B58Cvinyljunkie@198.186.190.155...
>
> Welcome to the group and welcome to your first day of sobriety.
> Please try to ignore the trolls who have recently invaded and just pay
> attention when someone really tries to help. Stay with it, please.
> Yes, it is tough at first but it gets much better -- in fact it gets
> to where you are glad to be alive.
> Dan
>
>
Thanks Dan. I find keeping busy helpful but naturally I can't concentrate
on anything for any length of time. That's why posting is good I guess.
I'm just feeling the ill effects of too much booze - hot/cold flashes,
shakes, anxiety. That kind of stuff. I've been drinking a lot of
water/juice today but that's it. No appetite for food and as bad as I
feel I think if there were something at hand to drink that I probably
would. I lost my liscense for DUI so fortunately I can't go get anything.
But it's the guilt that seems so burdonsome. I'm 49 and my youngest son
is 18. I've been drinking for 30 years so I can just imagine what his
impressions of me are. Of course it's dangerous to think like this
because it only reinforces the desire to drink. Anyway, just being able
to post and have someone comment, even if it's just to say 'hang in
there', helps a great deal. Hopefully this time I'll stick to it and get
to that point where I'm glad to be alive
VJ
| |
| Dan McGown 2006-06-04, 7:47 am |
|
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D69CF46E2ACvinyljunkie@198.186.190.150...
> "Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in
> news:z_udnbgwwJaL_B3ZnZ2dnUVZ_v6dnZ2d@adelphia.com:
>
<snip>
> Thanks Dan. I find keeping busy helpful but naturally I can't concentrate
> on anything for any length of time. That's why posting is good I guess.
> I'm just feeling the ill effects of too much booze - hot/cold flashes,
> shakes, anxiety. That kind of stuff. I've been drinking a lot of
> water/juice today but that's it. No appetite for food and as bad as I
> feel I think if there were something at hand to drink that I probably
> would. I lost my liscense for DUI so fortunately I can't go get anything.
> But it's the guilt that seems so burdonsome. I'm 49 and my youngest son
> is 18. I've been drinking for 30 years so I can just imagine what his
> impressions of me are. Of course it's dangerous to think like this
> because it only reinforces the desire to drink. Anyway, just being able
> to post and have someone comment, even if it's just to say 'hang in
> there', helps a great deal. Hopefully this time I'll stick to it and get
> to that point where I'm glad to be alive
>
> VJ
VJ, I think that you'll be surprised how your son will be just grateful that
you have stopped drinking. Mine was -- and still is. I'm 60 now and he's
17. When I quit, it was also because of a DUI. Please use a negative thing
in a positive way. Remember and hold on to the embarassment and shame that
you feel when you think about what your son might think of you.
When you get past that and realize how glad he is to have a sober dad in his
life, use the memory of the shame and embarassment as a shield against the
times that you are tempted to drink. That's the time to remind yourself
that you don't want to really deserve that shame and embarassment and to
lose the gladness in your son.
They tell you that you can't quit for someone else and that you have to quit
for yourself. That may be true but it surely helped me that my self didn't
want to be responsible for ending the light in my son's eyes when he saw me
sober.
Keep at it and *I* *promise* it will get better. It will get great.
Dan
| |
|
| "Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in
news:oa-dna6DBcoRFx3ZnZ2dnUVZ_tWdnZ2d@adelphia.com:
>
> VJ, I think that you'll be surprised how your son will be just
> grateful that you have stopped drinking. Mine was -- and still is.
> I'm 60 now and he's 17. When I quit, it was also because of a DUI.
> Please use a negative thing in a positive way. Remember and hold on
> to the embarassment and shame that you feel when you think about what
> your son might think of you.
>
> When you get past that and realize how glad he is to have a sober dad
> in his life, use the memory of the shame and embarassment as a shield
> against the times that you are tempted to drink. That's the time to
> remind yourself that you don't want to really deserve that shame and
> embarassment and to lose the gladness in your son.
>
> They tell you that you can't quit for someone else and that you have
> to quit for yourself. That may be true but it surely helped me that
> my self didn't want to be responsible for ending the light in my son's
> eyes when he saw me sober.
>
> Keep at it and *I* *promise* it will get better. It will get great.
>
> Dan
>
>
I did succeed in using the DUI initially. I didn't think I would ever be
able to take another drink. But I lasted all of a month. At the time it
became very apparent to me that if I didn't want to quit, seriously want to
quit, then all sorts of events and strategies weren't going to work. I just
wish it was easier to deal with the guilt. And although I have a supporting
spouse she doesn't know what its like to be in the state I'm in today. She
wants me to quit, but she still wants to have a glass of wine with meals
and induldge herself once a weekend. I can't do that. I never could. But
anyway, all I want her to understand is how hard its going to be and that I
won't be able to attend function and things until I have more confidence.
Sorry for the rambling. My thoughts are all scattered today. Anyway, thanks
for comforting words. I'll be checking in often.
VJ (Mike)
| |
|
| On 02 Jun 2006 14:33:37 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>Hi,
>
>I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
>this will be an active group with people readily sharing their experiences.
>Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
>could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
>tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
>but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
>started.
>
>VJ
Hello VJ.
You mentioned you were 49 and the impressions your son may have of
you.
I quit drinking at 49 and now have nine years and I can ensure you
that things work out just fine, if you quit drinking.
Even if they dont ,after working the steps and obtaining some time
sober you can can say " I did the best I can do". Once you have
accepted the fact the you cant change your past and try to live in the
day, it gets better.
"One day at a time " pretty simple concept, sometime one minute at a
time.
I wont bore you with my story, but it included jails, then prisons,
then 6 months of residential treatment , courtesy of the Federal
Goverment.
Even after all that I wasnt sure if I wanted to stay clean and sober.
Somwhere during this process something happened that I cant describe
other than the obsession to drink was gone.
I think it was when I had more reasons not to take a drink then to
take one,, sometimes this can occur in a very short amount of time,
sometimes never.
Go to a few meeting , find someone thats seems to have something you
like about him and walk up to him and tell him you need some help.
I go to a few meeting a week and am not thrilled about it, however I
never went nine years without a drink.....so I keep going.
I enjoy helping others, suppose thats another reason I'm still sober.
Maybe the best thing you ever did........try it.
Good Luck and Best Regards,
Daveb
| |
| readandpostrosie 2006-06-04, 7:47 am |
| welcome to sobriety VJ!
its ONE DAY AT A TIME, and for me AA meetings are the key!
--
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D680589B58Cvinyljunkie@198.186.190.155...
> Hi,
>
> I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
> this will be an active group with people readily sharing their
> experiences.
> Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
> could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
> tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
> but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
> started.
>
> VJ
| |
| Darren 2006-06-04, 4:20 pm |
|
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D680589B58Cvinyljunkie@198.186.190.155...
> Hi,
>
> I'm new to this group, and actually to this kind of forum. I'm hoping that
> this will be an active group with people readily sharing their
> experiences.
> Today is my day one. I hate feeling the way I feel right now. I wish I
> could remember this feeling the next time I get the urge to drink. I've
> tried quitting before but never had any success. I haven't gone to AA yet
> but I might have to. Anyway, I just wanted to post and get this recovery
> started.
>
> VJ
I was sober for three days before I went to AA. Make of them what you will
but they do help. Hang in there and don't give yourself time to crave. I
know it's difficult so don't try and do it alone. keep busy, keep plenty of
cold non-alcoholic drink and chocolate in the home and keep your friends,
family close. It's a long road but a worthwhile one.
-
Darren
| |
|
| "Darren" <darren@something.com> wrote in
news:I8Egg.5368$rC1.1358@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net:
>
> I was sober for three days before I went to AA. Make of them what you
> will but they do help. Hang in there and don't give yourself time to
> crave. I know it's difficult so don't try and do it alone. keep busy,
> keep plenty of cold non-alcoholic drink and chocolate in the home and
> keep your friends, family close. It's a long road but a worthwhile
> one.
>
> -
> Darren
>
>
>
Hey thanks for the advice Darren. I found a meeting about ten minutes from
here so that's close and a step in the right direction. I read an earlier
post about thiamin deficiency being a common result of alcohol abuse and I
looked it up on the net. I found a condition that describes me to a T. I
can't remember how to spell it but the physical treatment involves nutrition,
among other things of course. I always felt better when I exercised and ate
well, but of course abuse gets in the way of all that. My plan is to have my
bike at the ready at all times and to start a fitness program (where I'll
surely encounter fit-minded people and benifit from their enthusiasm). Today
I feel good about my decision and tomorrow I'll feel good because I followed
through on that decision. Thanks again for the kind words.
Mike
| |
| Darren 2006-06-05, 4:20 pm |
|
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97D97A81BE755vinyljunkie@198.186.190.155...
> "Darren" <darren@something.com> wrote in
> news:I8Egg.5368$rC1.1358@newsfe4-gui.ntli.net:
>
>
> Hey thanks for the advice Darren. I found a meeting about ten minutes from
> here so that's close and a step in the right direction. I read an earlier
> post about thiamin deficiency being a common result of alcohol abuse and I
> looked it up on the net. I found a condition that describes me to a T. I
> can't remember how to spell it but the physical treatment involves
> nutrition,
> among other things of course. I always felt better when I exercised and
> ate
> well, but of course abuse gets in the way of all that. My plan is to have
> my
> bike at the ready at all times and to start a fitness program (where I'll
> surely encounter fit-minded people and benifit from their enthusiasm).
> Today
> I feel good about my decision and tomorrow I'll feel good because I
> followed
> through on that decision. Thanks again for the kind words.
>
> Mike
That's the ticket. Eat good food, get exercise, don't let anything piss you
off and take one day at a time.
-
Darren
| |
| fenster67 2006-06-05, 4:20 pm |
| so far, this has been a pretty cool group. How many days now?
| |
|
| "fenster67" <fenster67@yahoo.com> wrote in news:1149532465.792926.85960
@j55g2000cwa.googlegroups.com:
> so far, this has been a pretty cool group. How many days now?
>
>
Pretty cool indeed. I've got more _good_ information in the four days that
I've been here, than all my other attempts at sobriety put together.
| |
| fenster67 2006-06-05, 9:20 pm |
| how many days do you have. rigght now, i have 6 months. on about my
15th try...just letting you know that you can never slip too much.
Just keep trying.
| |
| fenster67 2006-06-05, 9:20 pm |
| how many days do you have. rigght now, i have 6 months. on about my
15th try...just letting you know that you can never slip too much.
Just keep trying.
| |
|
| "fenster67" <fenster67@yahoo.com> wrote in news:1149554666.990880.106030
@i40g2000cwc.googlegroups.com:
> how many days do you have. rigght now, i have 6 months. on about my
> 15th try...just letting you know that you can never slip too much.
> Just keep trying.
>
I've got 5 days in. They haven't been torturous because I was just too
sick. But I feel great now so now the hard work begins. Congrats on 6
months. I'll be there someday too
| |
|
| On 06 Jun 2006 23:35:50 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>"fenster67" <fenster67@yahoo.com> wrote in news:1149554666.990880.106030
>@i40g2000cwc.googlegroups.com:
>
>
>I've got 5 days in. They haven't been torturous because I was just too
>sick. But I feel great now so now the hard work begins. Congrats on 6
>months. I'll be there someday too
How do you know?
Regards
Daveb
| |
|
| (DaveB) wrote in news:44862070.24243378@news.dslextreme.com:
> How do you know?
> Regards
> Daveb
>
There's an encouraging remark, because I won't stop trying until I succeed.
| |
| Dan McGown 2006-06-07, 8:21 am |
| VJ, Good answer. We have to work on a plan combining a short term tactic of
simply not drinking now against an underlying background belief that we will
succeed in the long term. My family's motto is: "dum spiro spero (while I
live I hope.)" I think, though, that it's more than mere unsupported hope.
I think that it's a conscious decision to pursue a goal with the expectation
of eventual success even if there are setbacks along the way. Keep at it,
eh?
Dan
"VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:Xns97DB3BA72A825vinyljunkie@198.186.190.150...
> (DaveB) wrote in news:44862070.24243378@news.dslextreme.com:
>
>
> There's an encouraging remark, because I won't stop trying until I
> succeed.
| |
| Dan McGown 2006-06-07, 8:21 am |
| BTW, I realize that the literal translation is "while I breathe, I hope."
"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:i4ydndUQpfDxUhvZnZ2dnUVZ_qWdnZ2d@adelphia.com...
> VJ, Good answer. We have to work on a plan combining a short term tactic
> of simply not drinking now against an underlying background belief that we
> will succeed in the long term. My family's motto is: "dum spiro spero
> (while I live I hope.)" I think, though, that it's more than mere
> unsupported hope. I think that it's a conscious decision to pursue a goal
> with the expectation of eventual success even if there are setbacks along
> the way. Keep at it, eh?
> Dan
>
>
> "VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:Xns97DB3BA72A825vinyljunkie@198.186.190.150...
>
>
| |
| readandpostrosie 2006-06-07, 4:20 pm |
| amen dan, amen!
--
"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:i4ydndUQpfDxUhvZnZ2dnUVZ_qWdnZ2d@adelphia.com...
> VJ, Good answer. We have to work on a plan combining a short term tactic
> of simply not drinking now against an underlying background belief that we
> will succeed in the long term. My family's motto is: "dum spiro spero
> (while I live I hope.)" I think, though, that it's more than mere
> unsupported hope. I think that it's a conscious decision to pursue a goal
> with the expectation of eventual success even if there are setbacks along
> the way. Keep at it, eh?
> Dan
>
>
> "VJ" <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:Xns97DB3BA72A825vinyljunkie@198.186.190.150...
>
>
| |
| Dan McGown 2006-06-07, 4:20 pm |
| Thanks, sweetie -- how's things with Rosie? Doing well, I hope?
"readandpostrosie" <readandpost@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:eVAhg.12494$3q2.5645@tornado.rdc-kc.rr.com...
> amen dan, amen!
>
> --
>
>
>
> "Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
> news:i4ydndUQpfDxUhvZnZ2dnUVZ_qWdnZ2d@adelphia.com...
>
>
| |
| readandpostrosie 2006-06-07, 4:20 pm |
| yes, things are going very well.........................i'm busy remodeling
and staying out of trouble.
thanks for asking!
--
"Dan McGown" <dmcgown@adelphia.net> wrote in message
news:AeednY3OPL7PQRvZnZ2dnUVZ_v-dnZ2d@adelphia.com...
> Thanks, sweetie -- how's things with Rosie? Doing well, I hope?
>
>
> "readandpostrosie" <readandpost@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:eVAhg.12494$3q2.5645@tornado.rdc-kc.rr.com...
>
>
| |
|
| On 07 Jun 2006 08:49:48 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>(DaveB) wrote in news:44862070.24243378@news.dslextreme.com:
>
>
>There's an encouraging remark, because I won't stop trying until I succeed.
Wasn't meant to be encouraging, I just wanted to see what your reply
would be.
I like to ask people why they think they had to take another drink
after being sober awhile and you get a million different reasons also.
But was a good answer and I wish you the best in your recovery.
If you keep it simple and keep it a day at a time it makes it easier.
Best Regards
Daveb
| |
|
| (DaveB) wrote in news:44872e2d.3569771@news.dslextreme.com:
>
> Wasn't meant to be encouraging, I just wanted to see what your reply
> would be.
>
> I like to ask people why they think they had to take another drink
> after being sober awhile and you get a million different reasons also.
>
>
> But was a good answer and I wish you the best in your recovery.
>
> If you keep it simple and keep it a day at a time it makes it easier.
>
> Best Regards
>
> Daveb
I thought about it after I replied and I thought, that's a good way to
build resolve in someone - challenge them. Thanks And I agree simple is
the plan, that keeping busy.
| |
|
| On 06 Jun 2006 23:35:50 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>I've got 5 days in. They haven't been torturous because I was just too
>sick. But I feel great now so now the hard work begins. Congrats on 6
>months. I'll be there someday too
Well, did you make it thru another day? Let us know
Regards
Daveb
| |
|
| (DaveB) wrote in news:4488a816.10701818@news.dslextreme.com:
> On 06 Jun 2006 23:35:50 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>
> Well, did you make it thru another day? Let us know
>
> Regards
>
> Daveb
Yup, I even made it through my days off, which I knew was going to be the
hardest so I started my exercise program. I hit a hard patch yesterday
though. I wandered around the house aimlessly for about an hour and then my
family came home from their day's work and that helped put an end to it.
Thanks for asking. So now I have 8 days.
| |
|
| On 10 Jun 2006 08:15:33 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>(DaveB) wrote in news:4488a816.10701818@news.dslextreme.com:
>
>
>Yup, I even made it through my days off, which I knew was going to be the
>hardest so I started my exercise program. I hit a hard patch yesterday
>though. I wandered around the house aimlessly for about an hour and then my
>family came home from their day's work and that helped put an end to it.
>Thanks for asking. So now I have 8 days.
Good deal,trust me even after quite a few years sober, I think of
having a drink at times.
I just dont pick one up......usally all I have to think about where I
came from and do I want to go back.
Insanity=Doing the same thing over and over and expecticing different
results.
Keep it Simple
Daveb
| |
|
| (DaveB) wrote in news:448b1f5f.1332944@news.dslextreme.com:
> On 10 Jun 2006 08:15:33 GMT, VJ <vinyljunkie99@hotmail.com> wrote:
>
>
>
> Good deal,trust me even after quite a few years sober, I think of
> having a drink at times.
>
> I just dont pick one up......usally all I have to think about where I
> came from and do I want to go back.
>
> Insanity=Doing the same thing over and over and expecticing different
> results.
>
> Keep it Simple
> Daveb
I know that's the key - don't pick one up. It all starts again with the
first drink. And I know all control is last after that.
| |
| 94 Proof 2006-06-14, 9:20 pm |
| cheers!
|
| |
|
|